The Courage to Love Again-The Psychology of Heartbreak

The risk of loving someone is the fact that heartbreak may come one day. It is associated with singlehood, neurotic tendencies, and an anxious/avoidant attachment. After the heartbreak one starts the fear being hurt again or/and you start to believe that there is something about you that makes it impossible for someone to love you properly.

Romantic love activates in the caudate nucleus through dopamine.  Psychologist refer to this part of the brain as the “reward system”, emphasizing the idea that love does trigger emotion but essentially it is more of a motivational state, the motivation to obtain and retain the objects affection. This part of the brain lights up when someone is in love and when someone is a cocaine addict, meaning you are essentially an addict. Getting over your lost love will be tedious but well worth it. Researchers have found that if a person was no longer in love but still in pain from a break up their brain would still be in motivation mode, and expecting a reward. Hence why heartbreak can bring visceral pain, your body is not getting what it wants. The grieving person has numerous neural circuits devoted to the lost person, and each of these has to be brought up and reconstructed to take into account the person’s absence.

Specifically, the pain may be caused by the simultaneous hormonal triggering of the sympathetic activation system (fight-or-flight system that increases the activity of the heart and lungs) and the parasympathetic activation system (rest-and-digest response, social engagement system). It’s like heart’s accelerator and brakes are pushed simultaneously, creating the feeling of heartbreak.

What can help?

  • Give yourself time to grieve and reflect
  • Forgive the other person and yourself
  • Work on rebuilding good feelings about yourself and a life on your own
  • Avoid assumptions that keep you mired in the wreckage of your past relationship
  • Be aware of old relationship patterns
  • Be open to someone who is different
  • Give love time to grow

If you or someone you know is seeking therapy due to heartbreak, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/this_is_your_brain_on_heartbreak

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/complicated-love/202011/love-after-heartbreak

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/complicated-love/202011/love-after-heartbreak

Body Dysmorphia: Symptoms and Treatment

Body dysmorphic disorder is a mental health disorder where one intensely focuses on appearance and body image, and cannot stop thinking about perceived defects and flaws. These flaws are minor and cannot be seen by others. The individual may feel so ashamed, anxious, and embarrassed that social interactions are avoided. These symptoms can cause extreme distress, be extremely time consuming, be disruptive, and cause serious problems in one’s work, school, and social life. Some may experience suicidal thoughts or behaviors. Both men and women can struggle with body dysmorphic disorder.

Symptoms of body dysmorphia can include:

  • A strong belief that you have a defect in your appearance that causes you to feel deformed and ugly
  • Engagement of behaviors that are difficult to resist or control such as frequently checking the mirror, skin picking, and grooming
  • Seeking cosmetic procedures but gaining little satisfaction
  • Constantly comparing your appearance to others
  • Often seeking reassurance from others about your appearance

Body dysmorphic disorder affects both males and females and typically starts in the early teenage years.

Risk factors include:

  • Societal pressure and expectations of beauty
  • Negative life experiences such as abuse
  • Having another mental health disorder

Shame and embarrassment are often associated with body dysmorphia and that may keep one from seeking treatment. Body dysmorphic disorder can last for years or be lifelong. If left untreated, it can get worse over time, so it is important that the disorder is identified and treated.

If you or someone you know is struggling with body dysmorphic disorder, please contact our psychotherapy/psychiatry offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/.

Sources

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/body-dysmorphic-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20353938

https://www.healthshots.com/mind/mental-health/everything-you-need-to-know-about-body-dysmorphic-disorder/

Image Source

https://www.healthshots.com/mind/mental-health/everything-you-need-to-know-about-body-dysmorphic-disorder/

Therapy Animals: How Therapy Animals Benefit Individuals with Mental Health Struggles

Therapy Animals: How Therapy Animals Benefit Individuals with Mental Health Struggles

By Celine Bennion

Have you ever had a bad day at school or work, felt irritable and discouraged, then came home to your pet greeting you with such enthusiasm that you forgot about your unpleasant day? Animals’ unconditional, loving nature has the power to instantly change a person’s mood, or even just help him or her feel better in general. This ability is utilized in therapeutic settings for those who struggle with mental disorders, as animals can facilitate healing in those afflicted.

Therapy animals are trained to exhibit certain mannerisms that are essential for providing therapeutic benefits to humans. These characteristics include gentleness, friendliness, and willingness to allow strangers to touch and interact with them. Pet owners may enroll their animals in such training to become registered in an official therapy animal organization. This certification allows therapy animals to visit nursing homes, hospitals, schools, and other institutions to provide comfort and companionship to those with whom they interact.

When a therapy animal is present in therapy sessions, patients feel more inclined to communicate and discuss difficult experiences. Additionally, they often experience an increase in self-esteem while in the presence of therapy animals. Individuals often find it difficult to disclose personal and emotional information with a stranger, which holds them back from receiving all of the benefits of psychotherapy. Therapy animals help to provide a sense of comfort, giving unconditional affection and creating a nonjudgmental atmosphere. Their presence makes it easier for patients to let down their guard and speak about their difficult experiences.

If you or someone you know is seeking therapy, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Sources: https://medicalmutts.org/our-service-dogs/psychiatric-service-dogs/

https://www.nami.org/Blogs/NAMI-Blog/November-2016/The-Power-of-Pet-Therapy

https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-truth-about-animal-assisted-therapy#1

Emotional Support Animals and Controversy

Emotional Support Animals and Controversy

By: Valeria Dubon

Emotional support animals (ESA’s) provide a comforting and consoling figure for individuals who suffer from some sort of mental illness. Although they can be in the form of many different pets, dogs are the most common form of ESA’s and they can be of any age and any breed. ESA’s can be defined as any animal that is prescribed by a licensed mental health professional to offer emotional support to a person that is suffering from a disabling mental illness. One example could be a psychologist prescribing an emotional support dog to ease a patient’s anxieties. Emotional support animals, however, are not service dogs; there is a key difference between the two types of support. ESA’s deal more with offering a soothing and relaxing friend to the owner; they can help ease anxiety, depression and phobias. Even so, they are not allowed in many public places and cannot go everywhere where the public is allowed. A service dog helps individuals perform tasks that they cannot do on their own. For example, they are trained to assist and alert someone who is hearing impaired and/or visually impaired, they are not their for simply companionship. Their training must alleviate a certain disability.

There is even another type of service dog called psychiatric service dogs that detect the beginning of a psychiatric episode and ease their effects; again this is different from an ESA. Unfortunately, although ESA and service dogs are both essential in their own ways, ESAs are not treated with the same level of respect and importance; as many people believe that they are simply not needed at all. Many people fabricate the need for emotional support animals and take advantage of the system, with people having the ability to buy certifications for only $50. This only adds to the ESA controversy. This has caused many places, including airlines, to restrict the use of ESAs, leaving people who actually need them in an unfortunate situation. This controversy is currently ongoing, with many people being against the excessive use of an emotional support animal. In order to reduce the number of fraudulent ESA certifications, it has been suggested that a standardized ESA assessment could be made and conducted by forensic practitioners with stricter guidelines. This in turn not only helps the owners of ESAs, but also the general public as well. An actual assessment and training will keep aggressive animals and lax owners from not only irritating the public but also from endangering it.

If you or someone you know is in need of an emotional support animal, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Sources :

https://www.akc.org/expert-advice/news/everything-about-emotional-support-animals/

http://jaapl.org/content/early/2020/09/16/JAAPL.200047-20

Depression: How Does it Affect Relationships

By: Jasmyn Cuate

Depression is one of the most common types of mental illness that Americans struggle with each day affecting approximately 1 in 6 Americans. Depression is characterized by feelings of sadness, emptiness, or hopelessness, irritability, angry outbursts, or low frustration tolerance, loss of interest in or ability to enjoy usual activities, sleep disturbance, fatigue and lack of energy, appetite disturbance, agitation, anxiety, feelings of worthlessness and guilt, difficulty concentrating, remembering things, making decisions, recurring thoughts of death, and thoughts of suicide.

Many individuals struggling with depression describe it as living in a heavy fog where you lose clarity about your life, start to have self-doubt, changing the way you view friends, family, and partners as well as how you think they view you.

Although many relationships experience problems, a partner dealing with depression or trying to help their partner overcome depression, may find themselves having more challenges to their relationship. Depression can cause overwhelming emotions such as detachment, distrust, and vulnerability. It can cause the partner to pay little attention to the other partner, be less involved, more irritable, start arguments, and have trouble enjoying time together. Factors such as high levels of conflict, lack of communication, difficulty resolving problems, and withdrawal can lead to depression.

Untreated depression can cause a cycle of self-destructive behaviors that can tear relationships apart. Research has shown that when one member of a couple has depression, there is an impact on the well-being of the other partner as well. In fact, BMC Public Health has found that partners of those with mental illnesses, show signs of anxiety and depression themselves.

If you or someone you know is seeking therapy for depression or experiencing relationship problems due to depression, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Sources: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/depression/signs-depression

https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/mind-guest-blog/the-warning-signs-that-depression-is-affecting-your-relationship/

Anxiety: Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD): Signs, Symptoms, and Treatment

Anxiety: Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD): Signs, Symptoms, and Treatment

By Celine Bennion

Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) is a common anxiety disorder in the United States, currently impacting 3.1% of the population; as many as 5.7% of U.S. adults report experiencing this disorder at some point in their lives. GAD is characterized by feelings of excessive worry which have no particular trigger. This anxiety can be felt about school, work, social interactions, or even common, everyday events. These behavior patterns and cognitive issues become disordered when they begin to disrupt normal functioning.

Symptoms of GAD include the following: restlessness, being wound-up or on-edge, fatigue, trouble concentrating, irritability, muscle tension, and sleeping problems including difficulty falling/staying asleep or unsatisfying sleep. At least three of these symptoms must be present for at least six months for a patient to be diagnosed with GAD.

Treatment:

Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) is a type of therapy that is particularly helpful in treating anxiety disorders, including GAD. This therapy involves teaching patients different ways to approach anxiety inducing situations by changing how they think, behave, and react to them. It also helps to implement social skills in patients.

Medications are another form of treatment for GAD. It should be noted, however, that medications are used to help decrease symptoms of a disorder and do not cure it entirely. Anti-anxiety and anti-depressant medications are commonly used to treat GAD. Anti-depressants work for both depression and anxiety by altering chemicals in the brain, specifically serotonin and norepinephrine. They help to regulate mood and relieve symptoms associated with these disorders. Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) and serotonin norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors (SNRIs) are the most commonly used anti-depressants. Anti-anxiety medications, such as benzodiazepines, are effective in treating anxiety symptoms quickly. They are often used as a second option when anti-depressants are not enough to relieve symptoms.

If you or someone you know is seeking therapy for an anxiety disorder, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Sources:

https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/anxiety-disorders

https://adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/generalized-anxiety-disorder-gad

https://adaa.org/blog/category/generalized-anxiety-disorder-gad (photo)

The Relationship between OCD and Eating Disorders

The Relationship between OCD and Eating Disorders

By: Suzanne Zaugg

Eating disorders are characterized as obsessive, repetitive thoughts, and ritualistic behaviors. Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a common, chronic long lasting disorder that characterizes uncontrollable thoughts or behaviors that an individual may feel they need to repeat certain things over and over. Statistics show that people with eating disorders are more likely to show signs of OCD, due to the overlapping traits of both OCD and eating disorders.

Understanding the similarities and differences between eating disorders and OCD can help develop a more comprehensive understanding of a patient that presents both of these disorders. People with an eating disorder may experience intrusive thoughts about food and body image, and may develop ritualistic behaviors. Examples of ritualistic behavior pertaining to eating disorders include body checking for any changes in shape or size, frequent weight checking, and skipping meals. An important distinction between OCD and eating disorders lies in the relationship between the thought and action of the individual.  People with OCD are typically interested in ridding themselves of their thoughts and feelings whereas; people with eating disorders may feel more tied to the components of this disorder and feels as if it is a part of their identity.

Since both eating disorders and OCD share overlapping diagnostic characteristics, treatments will look similar. Both exposure therapy and cognitive behavior therapy are very helpful treatments for both eating disorders and OCD. Exposure therapy is a psychological treatment that involves exposing the patient to the anxiety source or its context without the intention to cause any danger. Also, cognitive-behavior therapy is a treatment approach that helps you recognize negative or unhelpful thought patters.

If you or someone you know is seeking therapy for an eating disorder, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Sources:

https://www.waldeneatingdisorders.com/blog/eating-disorders-and-ocd-a-complicated-mix/

Anxiety and Tests

Anxiety and Tests

 As universities are opening up and students are returning back to the classroom, students may feel increases in test anxiety as they return to an academic setting. While some anxiety may be a good motivator for studying, a crippling amount of anxiety can result in a decrease in grades and an increased risk of mental health issues. Here are some tips to conquer testing anxiety.

  • Study Smarter, Not Harder: Make sure you’re prepared for the test. Don’t cram and don’t spend too long stressing over the subject. Ask friends and family for help, and set goals to help you reach your potential in different subjects.
  • Focus on the positives: Negativity can be a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you tell yourself you’ll do poorly, you’ll end up not having the motivation to study and thus do poorly. Practice positive self-talk and set realistic goals for yourself.
  • Build Good Habits: Manage your time wisely. Make sure to get enough sleep the day before the test and eat something nutritious the morning of the test.
  • Do Relaxation Exercises: There are a number of ways to alleviate physical symptoms. Do breathing exercises, count backwards from one hundred, and meditate. Find out which relaxation technique works best for you.

            As everyone returns to the classroom there will be an adjustment period. Be proactive in helping your test anxiety and practice the methods that work best for you.

If you or someone you know is seeking therapy for an anxiety disorder, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

SOURCE: https://www.therapistaid.com/therapy-guide/treating-test-anxiety#references

Abuse: Signs of Gaslighting in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship

Abuse: Signs of Gaslighting in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship

By: Julia Taormina

An emotionally abusive relationship can sometimes go undetected, as there is no physical evidence of abuse. Thus, it is important to be aware of signs that can indicate you or someone you know is in an emotionally abusive relationship. One of the most unnoticed signs is gaslighting.

As defined by the National Domestic Violence Hotline, “gaslighting is an extremely effective form of emotional abuse that causes a victim to question their own feelings, instincts, and sanity, which gives the abusive partner a lot of power.” Gaslighting is typically gradual throughout the course of a relationship, making it easy to go unnoticed in the beginning stages. It can start out with small comments such as: “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” or “you’re too sensitive,” and leave you questioning yourself.
Listed below are multiple gaslighting techniques an abusive partner may use:

  • Withholding: pretends not to understand or refuse to listen
  • Countering: questions the victim’s memory of events
  • Blocking / Diverting: changes the subject or questions the victim’s thoughts
  • Trivializing: makes the victim’s feelings appear unimportant

Throughout the gaslighting techniques, there is a consistent theme of an abusive partner invalidating the victim as a whole. The victim may find they are constantly second-guessing themselves, feel as if they are going crazy, constantly make excuses for their partners’ behaviors, cannot do anything right, and overall feel that something is wrong in the relationship but cannot quite put it into words. If you feel any of these may apply to your relationship, you are not alone.

If you or someone you know is seeking therapy, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Source:
https://www.thehotline.org/resources/types-of-abuse/

Image Source:
https://themighty.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Untitled-design-2020-08-07T105137.107-1280×427.png?v=1597442092

Borderline Personality Disorder in Men

Borderline Personality Disorder in Men

By Jenn Peraza

Borderline Personality Disorder (also known as BPD) is a personality disorder that is categorized in the DSM-V by intense fears of abandonment, emotional instability in everyday life and relationships, and a distorted sense of self. Studies have found that while BPD is equally as prevalent in men as it is in woman, statistically speaking, seventy-five percent of people with BPD are female. So why are females most likely to get diagnosed with BPD?

While the criteria for men and women with BPD are the same, men and women are more likely to exhibit different maladaptive behaviors. Women will most likely self-harm through eating disorders and cutting while men will more likely self-harm using substances and head banging. Due to this, men are more likely to end up in prison for violent behavior while women are more likely to seek mental health resources to deal with their self-harm.

There’s also a societal stigma around men receiving mental health help. While women are seen as emotional creatures, men are seen as unemotional and are told to “suck it up” or “man up” when they’re upset. Another factor is that the maladaptive behaviors of BPD are discouraged in women and encouraged in men. Men who have tumultuous relationships, aggressive behavior, and exert violent behavior are more likely praised in society than women who express the same symptoms.
Despite this, it is necessary to clear one’s mind of what is seen as typical behavior for men and to encourage the men in your lives to seek mental health help. By overcoming stigmas, more men can receive the necessary help for BPD and live fulfilling lives.

If you or someone you know is seeking therapy for a personality disorder, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

SOURCE:  https://www.verywellhealth.com/borderline-personality-disorder-in-men-5096081