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Discipline and the Effects of Yelling at a Child

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

By Katie Weinstein

When it comes to verbal abuse, many people disregard it as a form of abuse because it is not as concrete as physical or sexual abuse, and it is more difficult to draw the line between verbal abuse and scolding. However, the effects of yelling and verbal abuse are just as detrimental and intense as any other type of abuse and can lead to depression and anxiety.

Being yelled at frequently increases the activity of the amygdala, which is the area of the brain that is responsible for emotions. This is because loud noises are signaled to the brain as a warning sign for danger. The amygdala increases stress hormones in the body, which increases muscular tension. These signals tell the body to fight, flight, or freeze, but none of these options are okay when a parent is yelling at a child since it isn’t acceptable to run away from a caregiver or fight them, which leaves the body to be in a stress condition with no purpose or function.  

There are long term effects of yelling at a child frequently since the brain develops neuronal pathways according to our experiences. If the child is conditioned to frequently respond to stressful situations, the child will develop pathways that activate a stress response quickly. Since negative interactions impact a person more than positive interactions, it affects our expectations and self-esteem drastically, especially if the yelling involves name calling, as well as behavior. One might think that yelling would get a child not engage in a specific behavior, but in reality yelling increases bad behavior due to stress and increased aggression as a result of a hyperactive amygdala, which may cause the parent to yell more. Since the child is constantly stressed, they are at risk for mental health problems such as anxiety and depression. Additionally, since yelling is not an effective communication style, the child may not learn to properly communicate, which can affect the child’s relationships in the future, leading to more problems down the road.

If you or someone you know is experiencing trauma from verbal abuse please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

https://optimistminds.com/psychological-effects-of-being-yelled-at/

The Problem with Yelling

https://www.healthline.com/health/parenting/effects-of-yelling-at-kids

Procrastinating before bed? This might be why

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

By Katie Weinstein

Revenge bedtime procrastination is defined as the decision to sacrifice sleep for leisure activities. The reason it is called “revenge” bedtime procrastination is to get back at the day time hours for stealing away free time. Many people are tired when going to bed and intend to go to sleep, but chose to binge shows on Netflix or scroll through hours of Tik Toks without an external reason to stay awake, meaning there is an intention-behavior gap. 

Since revenge bedtime procrastination is still a relatively new idea in sleep science, the underlying psychology explaining this phenomenon is still being debated. One explanation is that daytime workload depletes our capacity for self-control, so we can’t fight our urge to stay awake to participate in leisure activities even though it means we will be better rested for the next day. Another explanation might be that some people are naturally “night owls” and are forced to adapt to an early schedule, so this is their way of finding time to recover from stress. A third explanation might be that, during the pandemic, domestic and work lives are blurred as people work overtime hours and do not divide work time from leisure time. 

The reason that it is important to be aware of revenge bedtime procrastination is because sleep is essential for our physical and mental health. Sleep deprivation can cause daytime sleepiness, which harms productivity, thinking, and memory as well causing physical effects such as insufficient immune function and increased susceptibility to cardiovascular disease and diabetes. 

In order to prevent revenge bedtime procrastination, try putting away technology 30 minutes before bed, create a regular bedtime routine, avoid caffeine late in the afternoon, and find time for leisure activities during the day. It is also important to recognize when you need help managing your procrastination and your sleep problems.

If you or someone you know is struggling with revenge bedtime procrastination or other types of sleep problems, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

What Is “Revenge Bedtime Procrastination”?

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/revenge-bedtime-procrastination-a-plight-of-our-times#Tips-for-better-sleep

Neurotic Perfectionism and Dance

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

By Katie Weinstein

Dancing is proven to lower rates of anxiety and depression as well as increase self-confidence and provide opportunities for social interaction. However, the competitive dance field creates an environment that promotes neurotic perfectionism, causing dancers to lose their love for dance. While perfectionism is what enables dancers to strive towards meeting their goals and working hard, neurotic perfectionism is when people set unreasonable expectations for themselves and feel shame when they do not achieve their goal. Neurotic perfectionism can lead to disordered eating, anxiety, substance abuse and depression.

Dancers feel that there is no excuse for not landing the part or not getting attention from their teacher besides lack of effort, so dancers spend hours perfecting their mistakes and comparing themselves to others in the mirror, fostering an incredibly competitive environment and causing dancers to become overly critical of their bodies and skills. Instead of focusing on the positive and creating opportunities from mistakes, dancers expect every movement to be perfect and are overly self-critical when this isn’t the case. Additionally, dancers compete with other people for their next paycheck, so they end up setting super high expectations that are nearly impossible to achieve, wishing they could get their leg up higher or look thinner than everyone else in the room. They often think that if they are not casted, they might not be able to afford to pay rent or buy groceries. Dancers end up pushing themselves too far, and often end up with insomnia from nervousness and injured because of burnout. This can even lead dancers to self-medicate so that their injuries are off the record, leading to substance abuse.

Some signs of neurotic perfectionism include setting unrealistic expectations, feeling shame or guilt and overemphasizing the final product, but underemphasizing the process. It is important to change your thought patterns so that you are not overly critical and can set realistic goals for yourself.

If you or someone you know is experiencing neurotic perfectionism, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/talking-about-trauma/202101/competitive-dancers-risk-neurotic-perfectionism

Dance and Mental Health

https://www.dancespirit.com/perfectionism_101-2326036484.html

Stop Nagging and Build Better Communication Skills

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

By Katie Weinstein

Nagging is a type of interpersonal communication defined as persistent, repetitive behavior to try to get an individual to complete or stop a task. Naggers are associated with a passive aggressive, obsessional and negative personality types. There is a common misconception that naggers enjoy nagging, but often times; the nagger’s mood is dysregulated and they feel anxious and frustrated. They obsess over a particular thing and cannot tolerate these feelings, so they off load their problems onto the nearest person available, which is why nagging is commonly associated with a partner. Additionally, naggers may have a high need structure for their immediate environment and have a deep fear that their world could spiral if things are not kept entirely in order.

Often times the nagger thinks that continuously asking for something will get the other person to complete the task that they need. In reality, the other person most likely responds in non-compliance, meaning they say yes to the nagger’s request, but do not follow through, ignore the nagger, or say no. This is because the person being nagged tunes out the nagger. The nagger then might become increasingly aggressive, which decreases the likelihood of compliance.

In order to get people to comply with a task it is important to practice better communication. One thing that might help is to give a person a to-do list either via text or on paper with an agreed upon, realistic deadline so that the person won’t forget the task and can complete it on their time. Another thing you can do is be straight forward. Instead of complaining that your partner never does the dishes, ask them to do the dishes. It is also important to know when you need help to stop nagging and begin working on better communication skills.

If you, you and your partner, or you and your family are looking for therapy please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/insight-is-2020/202106/two-motivations-the-nagging-personality-type

http://self.gutenberg.org/articles/eng/Nagging

https://www.webmd.com/women/features/stop-nagging

Burnout; what it is and how to prevent it

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

By Katie Weinstein

When push comes to shove, stress becomes burnout. This can lead to detrimental effects on our physical and mental health, so it is important to recognize when burnout is beginning to occur. Burnout is a gradual process that is defined as an extended period of stress and exhaustion that feels like it isn’t improving. Some signs of burnout are losing interest and motivation to a point in which you become disengaged, which can cause a cynical and resentful attitude. Burnout also affects physical health, causing changes in appetite and sleep and frequent headaches.

The causes of burnout include work, lifestyle, and personality traits. Lack of recognition in a chaotic or high pressure environment can make someone more susceptible to burnout. Some ways to improve work related burnout are to outsource or share responsibilities and to set boundaries for off times such as not checking email. Another cause of burnout can be caregiver burnout, since it can be very tiring to care for a child. It’s important to remember that it does not make you a bad parent or friend to ask for help when you need it. Everyone needs a break. Additionally, a perfectionist attitude and pessimistic view on things may lead to burnout, it is important to recognize when burnout is beginning so that you can practice stress managing techniques and find time to do things that you enjoy to prevent burnout. 

Knowing the difference between a burnout and being overly stressed is essential for mental health. It is important to limit contact with negative people and reach out to supportive friends and family in order to shape a more positive attitude and prevent burnout.

If you or someone you know is experiencing burnout or high levels of stress, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/burnout

Burnout Prevention and Treatment

OCD: Life During a Pandemic

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

By Charlotte Arehart

It seems logical to assume that those struggling with OCD are having a harder time during the COVID-19 pandemic. However, this is not necessarily true. While some people who suffer from OCD are having more troubles, not every person who has OCD is seeing a difference in their symptoms. For example, someone who’s OCD focuses on other infectious agents that are not COVID-19 will probably not see a lot of change in their symptoms. A study done in November of 2020 found that OCD symptoms increased in frequency significantly more in “washers,” or people who are afraid of contamination, than in non-washers with OCD.

Many individuals with OCD are expressing how the pandemic has made other people realize what it is like to obsess over contamination. For some people with OCD, this has been the way they have felt for their entire lives. For many of us, obsessively cleaning and sanitizing things has only become part of our habits because of the pandemic.

One benefit that doctors have been seeing during the pandemic, specifically for OCD treatment, is the fact that online therapy sessions allow the patient to have their session in any setting. Many people who are being treated for OCD use exposure therapy with their therapists to help reduce their symptoms. This involves patients exposing themselves to stimuli that may induce their symptoms in an attempt to reduce their anxiety about these symptoms. With sessions being held on telehealth, patients can move about their environment and even do their therapy in unusual locations that allow them to expose themselves, with professional direction, to their stressors. This would not always be possible in an office setting.

The bottom line is that one cannot assume that an individual with OCD is experiencing worse symptoms due to the pandemic. While this is true some people who are suffering from OCD, not every individual’s stressors include the virus. It is important that someone who is experiencing OCD seeks treatment as soon as possible, before symptoms worsen. OCD can be debilitating if it is extreme. Therapy is an excellent form of treatment for OCD.

If you or someone you know is struggling with OCD, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Sources:

https://www.columbiapsychiatry.org/news/covid-q-obsessive-compulsive-disorder-ocd

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7644184/

Image Source: https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2020/06/13/872466613/obsession-or-just-good-hygiene-keeping-the-coronavirus-and-ocd-at-bay

Mental Health during Pride Month

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment
  • Mental Health During Pride Month

By Charlotte Arehart

With June finally starting, this means that it is officially Pride Month! Pride Month is celebrated in June in the USA and many other countries. During Pride Month, we celebrate and recognize the impact that  lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer LGBTQ+ individuals have on their communities. We celebrate their history, whether it be locally, nationally, or internationally. Unfortunately, there is a stigma surrounding the LGBTQ+ community regarding mental health. There are a plethora of statistics about LGBTQ+ individuals and mental health, including the fact that members of the community are less likely to seek treatment for mental health, substance abuse, and eating disorders. This is largely due to fear of being discriminated against because of their sexuality. Pride Month is the perfect opportunity to prioritize and learn more about mental health for LGBTQ+ individuals.

There are many barriers that LGBTQ+ individuals face when it comes to finding mental health treatment. Many mental health centers lack culturally-competent or diverse staff and/or treatment. It was not very long ago that homosexuality and bisexuality were themselves considered mental illnesses. This was thought to be true until the 1960’s. Gay men and lesbian women were frequently forced to undergo “treatment” for their sexuality against their will, such as aversion, conversion, and even shock therapies. Also damaging to mental health, LGBTQ+ individuals are at a higher risk for bullying, and sometimes even hateful violent crimes. The best way to help the LGBTQ+ community regarding mental health efforts is to support the community not only through words but through actions. By reducing the stigma around mental health and making LGBTQ+ individuals feel as comfortable as possible, hopefully we can make mental health treatment more accessible for everyone. Luckily, the vast majority of mental health professionals today are accepting and positive towards the LGBTQ+ community. Everyone deserves to have efficient, effective, and professional mental health no matter how they identify as individuals.

If you or someone you know needs mental health support, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Sources:

LGBTQ+ Mental Health Statistics
Gay Pride: LGTBQ+Mental Health Awareness

Image Source: https://lgbt-speakers.com/news/top-10-lists/10-lgbt-speakers-for-pride-month-2021

Post Pandemic Social Anxiety

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

By Katie Weinstein ­­­­­­­­

Whether it is anxiety about rusty social skills or interacting with unvaccinated people, adjusting back to normalcy will be a challenge for everyone, so it is essential to find ways to cope with returning back to normal. 

One thing to keep in mind is that it is normal to have social anxiety about the adjustments that are to come. Everyone has been out of practice of picking up on social cues through Zoom. Like any skill, it might seem overwhelming to relearn at first, but with practice, people can regain their social skills. 

One way to help adjust and prevent post pandemic social anxiety is to gradually build up the amount of social interactions you are having and to slowly increase your group size. It is important to stretch a little out of your comfort zone by saying yes to some plans to get back into regularly seeing people, but it is also important to stand up for yourself and not participate in events that make you outwardly uncomfortable. Another thing that you can do to cope with post-pandemic social anxiety is reward yourself for going a little out of your comfort zone with things that you enjoy like ice cream or watching a movie. You can also try dressing up to go out. While lounging out in sweats is sometimes the most comfortable option, dressing up a little can make you feel like your best self and help you incentivize you to go out. It is also important to acknowledge when you need help and when to see someone to help cope with social anxiety.

Sources

If you or someone you know is struggling with social anxiety, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

https://www.healthline.com/health-news/after-a-year-of-isolation-social-interaction-may-cause-anxiety#Why-you-may-feel-anxious-about-returning-to-normal

https://www.verywellmind.com/social-anxiety-disorder-tips-302420

Social Media and Attention Span

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

By Katie Weinstein

People have spent increasingly more time on social media throughout the years which has led to shorter and shorter attention spans. This is because of click bait material and multitasking.

Social media is designed to grab people’s attention and get people to their next click so that people stay online for longer. Instead of publishing detailed, meaningful articles, people are now publishing more sensational, controversial pieces to get people to click. Because the material is very loud and polarizing, people have an urge to switch to new material, so new information is constantly competing for attention, reducing our attention span. This can be addictive in nature and teaches people to focus on engaging material for a short period of time and stay on social media for a long period of time. 

Additionally, social media is something that is commonly used while completing another task. When a person is multitasking, attention span is reduced. The effects are especially detrimental for younger people who are more susceptible to developing bad habits. The average attention span in 2000 was 12 seconds and is now 8 seconds, which is 1 second shorter than the attention span of a goldfish! This is because it takes greater cognitive effort to switch between tasks than it does to maintain the same level of concentration on one task. Research has also shown that episodic memory can be significantly reduced when multitasking. 

Some ways to prevent declining attention spans are:

  • Implementing a “no phone at dinner” rule
  • Complete one task at a time 
  • Put your phone away while working 

If you or someone you know is struggling with attention span, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Sources 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/culture-shrink/201812/is-social-media-destroying-our-attention-spans

http://global.chinadaily.com.cn/a/202101/22/WS600a2710a31024ad0baa4577.html#:~:text=The%20explosion%20of%20social%20media,just%208%20seconds%20in%202013.

https://muckrack.com/blog/2020/07/14/how-declining-attention-spans-impact-your-social-media

Eating Disorders: Prevalence in College Students

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment
  • Eating Disorders: Prevalence in College Students

Anyone can develop an eating disorder, no matter their gender, sexuality, age, or economic status. However, recent studies have shown a surge in occurrences of eating disorders among college students for both men and women. A 2011 study showed that occurrences of eating disorders specifically on college campuses increased from 7.9% to 25% in men, and 23.4% to 32.6% in women over the course of a 13 year period. While there are approximately 30 million people who struggle with an eating disorder at some point in their life, why is it so prevalent among college students?

When entering college, young adults are suddenly being faced with multiple issues that they have never had to face before. They have a new schedule, intense workloads, stress about making friends and getting good grades, as well as a new sense of freedom that they have probably never had until that moment. College life for most students is typically drastically less structured than life at home. In addition to these factors, most public media pushes a thin or slim ideal body type. Typical eating habits of college students also make it difficult for someone with an eating disorder to eat normally. Poor cafeteria food or access to lots of junk food makes it hard for students to maintain normal eating habits. Often times, the new stressors of college will re-surface pre-existing mental illnesses, or even cause new ones to emerge. When all of these factors combine with anxiety and self-esteem issues, it is highly likely that an individual will develop an unhealthy obsession with eating and body weight in an attempt to feel control in a stressful environment.

When someone is diagnosed with an eating disorder, it is important that their family and loved ones support them during this time. Eating disorders are dangerous and deadly; but there are ways to recover. There are specialized treatment centers for eating disorders, as well as the hotline at the National Eating Disorders Association (https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/help-support/contact-helpline). If someone is developing an eating disorder, it is very beneficial for them to seek therapy as soon as possible.

If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder or disordered eating, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Sources:

https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/10640266.2011.584805

https://www.healthline.com/health-news/eating-disorders-on-college-campuses-are-on-the-rise#Eating-disorders-on-the-rise

National Eating Disorders Association

https://childmind.org/article/eating-disorders-and-college/

Image Source: https://www.houstonpublicmedia.org/articles/news/health-science/coronavirus/2020/12/17/387599/for-those-with-eating-disorders-holidays-in-a-pandemic-can-create-extra-anxiety/