low self esteem bergen county nj

Dependent Personality Disorder

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

    By: Lauren Zoneraich

    Dependent Personality Disorder (DPD) is characterized by an overdependence on others to feel secure and function. A personality disorder is defined by the possession of an unhealthy and unwavering way of thinking, functioning, and behaving. People with personality disorders often experience difficulty in relationships, school, work, and social situations because their unhealthy cognitions often lead to problematic behaviors that may upset or bother people in their life.

    For those with DPD, it feels impossible to function without the help and support of others. This overwhelming reliance on others for emotional and physical security causes an intense fear of abandonment, often leading to anxious behaviors that partners or friends may describe as “needy” or “clingy.” Anxious behaviors include being overly passive or submissive, being unable to disagree with others, and tolerating poor treatment by others. People with DPD would rather stay in a bad relationship than be by themselves. When relationships end, people with DPD may feel depressed. Immediately, they may begin searching for new relationships, as the thought of being alone is unfathomable.

    People with Dependent Personality Disorder often lack self-confidence and self-efficacy. As a result, they cannot make decisions, even small decisions, without the approval or validation of others, nor start projects on their own.

    There are no direct causes for DPD, but there are some risk factors that may contribute to its development. These risk factors include traumatic abandonment during childhood, a family history of personality disorders, a family history of anxiety or depression, and chronic childhood illness. Also, growing up with withdrawn, abusive, or overly- controlling parents is a risk factor for DPD.

    Psychotherapy can help one address the symptoms of DPD, specifically Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and psychodynamic therapy. CBT can help one learn to reframe one’s cognitions, while psychodynamic therapy can help one become conscious of the roots of one’s personality disorder.

    If you or someone you know is struggling with relationships, self-esteem, or daily functioning, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

    Sources:

    https://www.sheppardpratt.org/knowledge-center/condition/dependent-personality-disorder/

    https://www.healthline.com/health/dependent-personality-disorder

    https://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/guide/dependent-personality-disorder

    https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/personality-disorders/symptoms-causes/syc-20354463

    Image Sources:

    https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/personality-disorders/what-is-dependent-personality-disorder-and-what-does-it-mean-for-me/

    Body Image: The Negative Effects of Zoom

    GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

      By: Lauren Zoneraich

      Due to the transfer of meetings, classes, and other events from in-person to Zoom, people are experiencing an increase in self-consciousness from looking at their faces on a screen. In normal interactions, we do not need to confront our own image, but on Zoom we constantly face it. During Zoom meetings, it may be difficult to avoid focusing on how we look when we listen, talk, and emote. Continually staring at our own image can bring our insecurities to the forefront of our minds. In fact, our perception of our image may become distorted the longer we look at ourselves.

      Zoom meetings may be especially difficult for people who already struggle with body dissatisfaction, or its more severe form, body dysmorphia. Body dysmorphic disorder is a preoccupation with one’s appearance, especially minor aspects of appearance which one perceives as a defect or flaw. People with body dysmorphia may have low self-esteem and believe that the perceived defect in their appearance makes them ugly or deformed. The preoccupation with the perceived flaw may cause anxiety in social situations. People with body dysmorphia may frequently check their image or groom themselves as a means to “fix” their perceived flaws. Features on technology, such as the “selfie camera” on the iPhone, serve as mirrors that enable people to repetitively perform these checking behaviors. The selfie camera also promotes preoccupation with one’s appearance. The Zoom screen is a permanent, overstimulating mirror.

      A survey of a class at Cornell University revealed that the main reason students do not keep their cameras on during Zoom classes is due to insecurities about how they look. Zoom has implemented some features to combat these body image issues. Users can choose to “Hide Self View” so that they cannot see their own image on the Zoom call. Still, although they cannot see themselves, people may still worry about how others see them. If one is constantly staring at oneself or worrying about how one looks, one may not be able to focus on the content of the meeting.  Mind-wandering may decrease the level of happiness one feels while participating in a certain activity. Thus, eliminating distractions may make classes and meetings more enjoyable for participants.

      If you or someone you know is struggling with body image or body dysmorphia, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

      Sources:

      https://cornellsun.com/2021/05/03/zoom-classes-heighten-self-consciousness-introducing-new-classroom-distraction/

      https://www.vogue.com/article/body-dysmorphia-zoom-face

      https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/body-dysmorphic-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20353938#:~:text=Body%20dysmorphic%20disorder%20is%20a,may%20avoid%20many%20social%20situations.

      https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/does_mind_wandering_make_you_unhappy

      Image Source:

      https://www.pcmag.com/how-to/how-to-prevent-zoom-bombing

      Low Self-Esteem: Dating Apps Can Decrease One’s Self-Confidence

      GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

      By: Lauren Zoneraich

      With the advent and prolonged continuation of the COVID-19 pandemic, many young adults have turned to dating apps as a way to connect with potential romantic partners, speak to new people, and entertain themselves. The most popular dating apps among young adults are Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, and Grindr, which are visually-based dating apps. Instead of text-heavy profiles, like those seen on Match.com, users swiftly accept or reject others based on their profile photographs, which dominate the page display. How does the visually-based nature of dating apps affect the self-esteem of dating app users?

      One’s physical appearance and self-esteem are strongly linked. Self-esteem is defined as the self-evaluation a person holds regarding their worth, success, and capabilities. In a survey-based study of young adults, researchers determined that the visual nature of Tinder could raise or lower the self-esteem of users. Users who matched with a lot of attractive users and received many messages experienced an ego boost. Contrarily, many participants reported that the visual nature of the Tinder made them feel more self-conscious about their appearance. Users felt a decrease in self-esteem when they did not match with a lot of people or when they only received messages from unattractive matches. Many participants reported “swiping left on” (rejecting) users who they anticipated would not “swipe right on” (accept) them, or swiping left on users they liked to avoid the possibility of being rejected and experiencing a decrease in self-confidence. These reports highlight how Tinder can trigger negative assessments of the self even before a user is rejected, and of course, decrease a user’s self-confidence after rejection.

      Online dating apps are not meant for everyone. If you find that apps such as Tinder are lowering your self-esteem, it may be best to delete these apps and meet partners through other avenues.

      If you or someone you know is struggling with low self-esteem, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

      Reference:
      Kallis, R. (2021). Creating a future relationship or destroying my self-esteem? An exploratory study on dating app experiences and well-being. Journal of Communication Technology, 4(1), 78-100. https://doi.org/10.51548/joctec-2021-005

      Image Source:

      https://www.theverge.com/2016/1/11/10749670/tinder-secretly-ranks-users-desirability

      What is Seasonal Affective Disorder?

      GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

        By: Kassandra Lora

        Once the seasons change from fall to winter and the days become shorter, some individuals may notice a change in their moods. Some of these mood changes may be a slight feeling of being “down” but other times, these mood changes can be more severe and can have a significant effect on a person. Seasonal Affective Disorder is a type of depression that usually affects a person once the seasons are changing. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, “SAD symptoms start in the late fall or early winter and go away during the spring and summer; this is known as winter-pattern SAD or winter depression.” It is not as common for someone to develop SAD symptoms during the spring and summer months, although it is still possible.

        Some significant depression symptoms may include:

        •           feeling depressed most of the day, nearly every day

        •           losing interest in activities

        •           changes in appetite or weight

        •           having problems with sleep

        •           having low energy

        •           feeling worthless or hopeless

        •           having difficulty concentrating

        •           having frequent thoughts of death or suicide.

        Although Seasonal Affective Disorder is a type of depression, to develop the diagnosis of having SAD, you must have the symptoms of major depression or must have some of the symptoms listed above. You must also have these depressive episodes occur to you during a specific season for a least two consecutive years.

        Individuals who are more susceptible to developing SAD are more commonly those who live further north. Furthermore, according to the Nation Institute of Mental Health, “SAD is more common in people with major depressive disorder or bipolar disorder, especially bipolar II disorder, which is associated with recurrent depressive and hypomanic episodes.” SAD is also more commonly found in women than men.

        Seasonal Affective Disorder is a severe condition, though scientists cannot understand what exactly causes SAD. Scientists have done the research and have suggested that people with SAD may have reduced serotonin activity, regulating mood. Researchers have also indicated how lack of sunlight in people with SAD can affect their serotonin levels, affecting their mood. Although these are all possible causes and effects which determined why individuals may have SAD it is still unclear if these are the exact reason. However, these causes and effects can be useful when focusing on treatment.Treatments that may help people with SAD include light therapy, psychotherapy, antidepressant medications, and vitamin D.

        Speak to your health care provider about which treatment or combination is most suitable for you. If you or someone you know is struggling with Seasonal Affective Disorder, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices.

        Source: https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/seasonal-affective-disorder/index.shtml

        Image Source: https://www.sciencemag.org/careers/2019/03/how-i-learned-cope-seasonal-affective-disorder-grad-school

        Social Anxiety Disorder

        GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

        Social Anxiety Disorder

        Social Anxiety Disorder

        By: Julia Keys

        It is typical to feel a bit nervous before public speaking or maybe a little anxious before a performance, however, for those with Social Anxiety Disorder, or SAD, even the smallest interactions with others can provoke feelings of extreme anxiety. Social Anxiety Disorder is characterized by a strong and persistent fear of humiliation and embarrassment that could be caused by social situations. People with Social Anxiety Disorder struggle with feelings of self-consciousness that are produced by the possibility of judgement in social interactions. Oftentimes the distress caused by social situations can become so overwhelming for those with SAD that they begin to avoid everyday activities and responsibilities such as going to work, going to school, or picking up the phone.

        Signs of Social Anxiety Disorder:

        • Anxiety about being with other people
        • Difficult time interacting with others, stuttering, trailing off, and reserved behavior are common
        • Self-consciousness in front of other people and feelings of embarrassment
        • Fear of being judged
        • Difficulty making and keeping friends
        • Blushing, sweating or trembling around other people
        • Other physical symptoms such as disorientation, shallow breath, diarrhea, muscle tension and upset stomach

        Social Anxiety Disorder can be treated with psychotherapy, medication, or both. A common affliction for those with SAD is the rumination that follows social interactions. New types of therapy are being developed to help those with SAD deal with this common symptom: post-event processing or PEP Mindfulness based therapies are aiming to target the feelings of shame, worry, and embarrassment that are caused by overanalyzing personal performance in social situations. Cognitive-Behavioral therapy helps people with SAD change unhealthy thought patterns that may be contributing to their anxiety. Medications such as antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds are often used in conjunction with psychotherapy. Social Anxiety Disorder affects over 19 million people across the US; however 35% of those suffering with social anxiety waited over ten years to seek treatment. Don’t hesitate to reach out and get the help you need.

        If you or a loved one is struggling with social anxiety, do not hesitate to seek help by contacting Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy, located in New York and New Jersey to speak to licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners or psychotherapists. To contact the office in Paramus NJ, call (201) 368-3700. To contact the office in Manhattan, call (212) 722-1920. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/ .

        Sources:

        https://www.anxiety.org/social-anxiety-disorder-sad

        https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201904/the-one-dose-approach-help-social-anxiety-disorder

        Source for Picture:

        https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&id=1DCB8A68F1C1E13F5FC8DB9E2A8A155D5018D398&thid=OIP.S96UZQjJADokE5fdhVCocAHaHa&mediaurl=https%3A%2F%2Fsocialanxietyinstitute.org%2Fsites%2Fdefault%2Ffiles%2FFemale3_0.jpg&exph=360&expw=360&q=social+anxiety&selectedindex=414&ajaxhist=0&vt=0&eim=1,2,6

        Self Esteem: Low Self Esteem and Comparison

        GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

        Self Esteem: Low Self Esteem and Comparison

        Self Esteem: Low Self Esteem and Comparison

        By: Julia Keys

        It is easy to fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others. We compare ourselves to others so often that they rarely even notice it. A social psychologist named Leon Festinger first proposed the social comparison theory in 1954 stating that humans look to others in order to evaluate their own self-image. Comparison is a necessary part of human cognition. We need to compare things in order to make choices. For example, imagine you are choosing between two different new cars to buy. One must compare the different traits of each car in order to make a well-rounded decision. Unlike cars, humans have unique and complex sets of experiences and genes, so comparing yourself to others isn’t logical. Unfairly comparing yourself to others is an unhealthy habit that can lead to low self-esteem, feelings of anxiety, and feelings of depression. Everyone has compared themselves to someone else at some point, but some people seem unusually preoccupied with it.

        Here are some reasons why certain people tend to compare themselves to others frequently:

        • They feel like they have a lack of control over their life
        • Low self-esteem, low self-confidence, or low self-worth
        • History of being compared to a family member
        • Lack of self-knowledge/self-reflective skills

        Ways to stop comparing yourself to others:

        • Limit social media use and when using, seek connection, not comparison
        • Take note of how often you compare yourself to others and mentally tell yourself to stop
        • Keep a journal with your own goals, aspirations, and self-reflections. Many times, people become so attached to certain ideals that they adopt from others that they forget to develop their own ideals. For example, if a child was told by his mother all his life that he must pursue a certain profession, they may be ignoring other career paths that they want to pursue. It is important to self-reflect so one can align their goals and behaviors to the wants and needs of their true selves.
        • If you do compare yourself, try to compare yourself to someone/something that is just slightly out of reach and well defined. When comparisons are general, one can get stuck in a rut of constant unfair comparisons instead of taking action and being able to achieve specific goals. Additionally, comparing yourself to something that is so out of reach can be discouraging. For example, if a woman compares body to an Olympic athlete, she is not setting a defined goal in order to be more like the athlete. In this case, it would be more helpful for the woman to aspire to be like her active friend who walks every day and schedule daily walks so she can exercise more.
        • Practice gratitude for your mind, body, spirit, and relationships
        • Only compare yourself to yourself, which is also known as internal validation. Internal validation is beneficial to your well-being and self-esteem.

        If you or someone you know is struggling with low self-esteem or confidence issues, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/.

         Sources:

        https://blogs.psychcentral.com/childhood-neglect/2019/05/5-reasons-you-compare-yourself-to-others-and-how-to-stop-it/

        https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/201711/the-comparison-trap

        Source for Picture:

        https://www.google.com/search?q=apples+and+oranges&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjE6d6ButfiAhXypVkKHRElCIUQ_AUIECgB&biw=1280&bih=610#imgrc=aoygGAqHovpj6M:

        Low Self Esteem: Imposter Syndrome

        GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

        Low Self Esteem: Imposter Syndrome

        Low Self Esteem: Imposter Syndrome

        By: Julia Keys

                Do you ever feel like no matter how much you accomplish, you still are inadequate compared to others around you? Feeling fraudulent about one’s achievements is so common that psychologists have given it a name: Impostor Syndrome.  People with Impostor syndrome doubt their own accomplishments and have a fear of being exposed as a fraud among their colleagues.  Despite the fact that people with Impostor Syndrome have great external evidence for their accolades, they still cannot be convinced that they deserve what they have accomplished.Those with Impostor Syndrome often attribute their success to external factors such as luck or good timing.

        Impostor Syndrome can be caused by perfectionism and fear of failure. However, if you are afraid you won’t be perfect or that you will fail, then you will be discouraged from going after new goals! The constant pressure found in those with Impostor Syndrome can cause feelings of guilt, shame, embarrassment, and at its worst, depression and anxiety.

        One group of people that are especially prone to Impostor Syndrome are highly successful women.  The discrepancy between external achievement and internalization of achievement within successful women may be caused by our society’s standards. Gender roles have greatly shaped what it looks like to be a successful man versus what it looks like to be a successful woman. Successful men are stereotypically in positions of power while successful women are stereotypically in caretaker’s positions.  The type of achievements that constitute success in our culture, such as obtaining a high degree, being financially successful, or being promoted to a leadership position are more aligned with the stereotypes of male achievement, which may explain why when women achieve such goals, they feel like frauds.

        No one should have to feel like a fraud, especially if they prove to be very high achieving. If you or someone you know can relate to the information above, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/ .

        Sources:

        https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-scientific-fundamentalist/200912/why-do-so-many-women-experience-the-imposter-syndrome?collection=59879

        https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-scientific-fundamentalist/200912/why-do-so-many-women-experience-the-imposter-syndrome?collection=59879

        Photo Source:

        https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1OPRB_enUS649US649&biw=703&bih=687&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=wdreXOyjA7CMggfj_7OACg&q=imposter+&oq=imposter+&gs_l=img.3..0i67j0l9.23457.23457..23925…0.0..0.65.65.1……1….1..gws-wiz-img.A4lE_uMxDas#imgdii=jwWSPXuWpL7DEM:&imgrc=rNl-1Zw95v2pzM: