How to Help Children Cope with Grief and Loss

How to Help Children Cope with Grief and Loss

By: Josette DeFranco

A question you don’t hear enough but should be asked more is “What is grief?” Grief is the terrible pain that accompanies loss. Since grief is a reflection of our love, it can feel suffocating. There is no time limit for healing the pain that comes along with loss. Many individuals try to suppress their pain and agony causing them to feel guilt and stagnant. Many individuals may experience grief in short passes where the feeling of distress and sadness comes and goes. Meanwhile, others may experience grief for a long period, such as months or years. It’s important to remind yourself and others that you can grieve at your own pace.

In addition, children experience grief and loss in many different ways. Children are like sponges; they take in information through observation and learned behavior. Although they are young they have deep feelings and can understand their own emotions more than it is perceived. When children grieve it can be a confusing time for them and parents. Do you tell the truth? Or do you rationalize and give simple answers such as “Grandpa is just sleeping.” Being present with them allows you to grieve as well. When children see that their parents can be vulnerable and compassionate it allows them to express themselves and be who they really are.

Here are a couple of ways to help children cope with grief:

  • You can tell children the truth, even though you might not include all the specific information. Mentioning to them that Grandpa is sleeping may cause them to feel afraid to go to sleep or telling them he is in heaven may make them pack their belongings and find heaven. Be clear, honest, and simple.
  • Allow them to ask questions. You can’t protect them from the truth but you can give them your empathetic support and love.
  • Attending the funeral or keeping children home. Ask your child and allow them to decide. If they say yes, have someone who will be present with them and can keep them occupied in case being around sad adults gets overwhelming. If they say no, you can offer another way to remember or honor the person such as showing pictures or lighting a candle.
  • Give reassurance.

If you or someone you know is struggling with their mental health, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ, or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit https://aristapsychiatrypsychotherapy.com/

Sources:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/playful-parenting/202301/how-to-help-children-cope-with-death-and-grief

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/tales-of-grief/201903/when-children-grieve

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/grief

Social Anxiety: The Impact of Social Media on Social Anxiety

Social Anxiety: The Impact of Social Media on Social Anxiety

By: Josette DeFranco

Social anxiety is very common and can be a part of your everyday living whether it is online or offline. Social anxiety means you have persistent fears about being in social situations. Social media has become society’s major way of communicating. It has allowed users to create their own distinctive profiles and content to share with others. It has been found that social media use has caused unrealistic goals and expectations. This can create low self-esteem and a lack of in-person interactions. This may lead to anxiety because you may feel like you don’t live up to your social media image. Nonetheless, it may cause you to feel judged by your choices or appearance. It is important to pay attention to your emotions when logged onto social media and to remember that others experience similar thoughts.

Should you take a break from social media?

Social media can affect individuals differently. However, if you notice social media is causing damage to your mental health, self-esteem, social interactions, and making your moods worse then you may want to consider a social media break. Having a social media break even for a week or a month could enhance your mental state, allowing you to reflect and focus on your mental health needs. It has been noticed that individuals felt more grounded and less anxious, isolated, and depressed.

If you or someone you know is struggling with their mental health, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit https://aristapsychiatrypsychotherapy.com/

Sources:

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S245195882100018X

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/thriving-with-the-challenges/202208/a-social-media-vacation-is-waiting-for-you

The Lessons of 9/11: Therapy and Resilience

By: Tehila Strulowitz

The other day I was sitting in my college Renaissance History course, learning about the joy, beauty, and creative innovation of an era that spanned three centuries following roughly 1,000 years of life so bleak and horrible that it gained an additional name: the “Dark Ages.” At one point during the lecture, my professor made an off-the-cuff remark about how since every generation spans more or less 20 years, and within that generation, everything that happens in the world is considered “current events,” the 23rd anniversary of the tragic day that is 9/11 is now considered “history.” We all sat there a little shocked and confused because how could over twenty years have passed and how could something discussed so frequently in the United States be considered history?

On the morning of Tuesday, September 11, 2001, first responders flocked by the thousands to the only building complex in the 10048 zip code in Lower Manhattan upon hearing the devastation that was unfolding in New York City. Thousands of therapists (social workers, psychologists, other mental health professionals, and so on) rushed to Manhattan in what psychologist Ghislaine Boulanger described as a “feeding frenzy” of therapists hurrying to help, (some even walking to fire stations and simply standing outside in case someone wanted therapy) all without knowing what helping would entail, all to assist in the efforts taking place in the aftermath of such a traumatic event witnessed live by hundreds of thousands of people. Boulanger, along with psychoanalyst and interfaith chaplain Margaret Klenck, described how at first the mental health professionals on the scene at that time were diving right into “the nitty-gritty” of therapy or “overmedicating people with tranquilizers and antidepressants,” when in reality, Klenck said, they were not depressed. They were traumatized and grieving, so naturally they were crying.

Psychologist Donna Bassin, who was a therapist for victims and their family members following 9/11, noticed that she was “emotionally transformed” by being a therapist during that time. “I started becoming more aware of community trauma, realizing how much people needed each other, not just 45 minutes in the psychotherapy office.” Years of trauma research and research on effective therapeutic practices have proven that most clients do not respond positively to long, detailed, and intense therapy immediately following a traumatic event. Richard McNally, a psychologist at Harvard, remarked how one of the most impactful lessons that were learned due to 9/11 was that people are far more resilient than we, specifically therapists in this case, thought.

As we look back on the past 23 years following a day that caused a loss of life for nearly 3,000 people and injured over 6,000, one lesson is starkly clear: we, as a community and as a nation, are more resilient than we think. We have built a bronze memorial, and etched in its surface the names of every single victim. We have built a new building in its place, 1,792 feet in the air, looking down over not only the historical New York City but also the 70-foot-deep memorial for the buildings. Therapists, first responders, the government, and doctors alike have all discovered new and more effective ways to deal with a country wreaked by terror and tragedy, and have created and discovered new ways to help people, built on the ashes of terror of times past.

Just like the “rebirth” that the Renaissance was, in 2024 we, too, can usher in our own enlightenment.

Psychiatric disorders associated with trauma exposure: PTSD, major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, panic disorder, and substance abuse disorders.

If you or someone you know is struggling with trauma-related disorders or with mental health in general, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

https://www.nytimes.com/2009/09/11/nyregion/11nyc.html

https://www.nytimes.com/2011/07/29/health/research/29psych.html

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2214999614002926

Drug Overdose: Frequency of Non-Substance Related Mental Health Disorders Among Drug Overdose Deaths

Drug Overdose: Frequency of Non-Substance Related Mental Health Disorders Among Drug Overdose Deaths

By Madison Gesualdo

Fatal drug overdoses in the United States have been on the rise in recent years, with the Center for Disease Control (CDC) reporting nearly 108,000 drug overdose deaths in 2022. However, a new study by the CDC suggests that screening and treatment for non-substance related mental health disorders, which frequently exhibit comorbidity with substance use disorders, may help lower the rate of overdoses in the United States.

The CDC found that approximately one in five individuals (22%) who died of a drug overdose in 2022 had a co-occurring, non-substance-related mental health disorder, with depression, anxiety, and bipolar disorders being the most prevalent. Additionally, it was reported that nearly 25% of these individuals had at least one opportunity for intervention with these disorders shortly before their death, including but not limited to visits to emergency departments and the locations where they were actively being treated at for their substance use disorder. With respect to this data, the CDC emphasizes the importance of integrating more screening practices for non-substance-related mental health disorders during interventions in individuals suffering from substance use disorders in order to improve mental health among these individuals and, potentially, decrease the amount of fatal overdoses.

Help and treatment are available to individuals with substance use disorders. Below are some of the many resources available to assist individuals with the screening and treatment of these disorders:

If you or someone you know is struggling with drug addiction and abuse or with mental health, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

References:

Dinwiddie, A.T., Gupta, S., Mattson, C.L., O’Donnell, J., & Seth, P. (2024, August 29). Reported non–substance-related mental health disorders among persons who died of drug overdose — United States, 2022. MMWR Morb Mortal Wkly Rep 2024;73:747–753. http://dx.doi.org/10.15585/mmwr.mm7334a3

Drug Enforcement Administration. (n.d.) Recovery resources. United States Drug Enforcement Administration. https://www.dea.gov/recovery-resources

Anxiety: How to Cope with Back-to-school Anxiety

Anxiety: How to Cope with Back-to-school Anxiety

By: Josette DeFranco

The first few weeks before school is back in session have greatly affected children and college students. Believe it or not, back-to-school anxiety is common and a manageable issue. Anxiety can impact a student’s concentration, memory, and ability to be engaged in activities. Also, another area being affected by back-to-school anxiety is social development. School is a main scene for socialization allowing students to build relationships and develop effective communication skills. Managing back-to-school anxiety is great for academic performance. Dealing with anxiety can help prevent social isolation, low self-esteem, and difficulty in forming healthy peer relationships.

There are many ways to make the change much easier and less stressful. Below are a few tips to help manage back-to-school anxiety.

  • Practice self-care
  • Create a support system
  • Focus on the positive
  • Rehearse the drop-off
  • Visit the school
  • Take deep breaths

If you or someone you know is struggling with their mental health, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit https://aristapsychiatrypsychotherapy.com/

Sources:

https://adaa.org/learn-from-us/from-the-experts/blog-posts/consumer/7-tips-addressing-back-school-anxiety

Freshman Year of College: Life Transitions & Mental Wellness

Freshman Year of College: Life Transitions & Mental Wellness

By: Kristen Thauer

Everyone who has attended college or university knows that the first year can be daunting. For many American teenagers, the transition to college has become increasingly fraught with anxiety. Some are excited to meet new people, attend interesting classes and move away from home. Others may worry about the financial hardships and potential isolation that comes with moving away from friends and family. Tuition costs have skyrocketed over the past few decades. The college experience our parents or even grandparents had seems like a distant memory.

While college is an incredible opportunity for growth, not only academically but socially and emotionally, many do struggle with the transition. Transferring colleges has become increasingly common as many students end up feeling as though their first choice was not the right fit. These experiences can sometimes make it more difficult to foster new friendships and a sense of community on campus. Unfortunately, many colleges have seen a dip in student engagement since COVID-19, meaning less and less students are going to club meetings, sporting events and even class.

 Many of these hardships students are facing today are caused by an uptick in mental health concerns. According to the American College Health Association’s database, 36% of college students have been diagnosed with depression and 26% of students have been diagnosed with anxiety. Regardless of the many factors that may be at play, students need mental health support both on and off campus. Reaching out for therapy in your college years can be a helpful and transformative experience as you navigate this life transition. There is no reason to suffer alone!

https://www.acha.org/ACHA/Resources/Topics/MentalHealth.aspx

If you or someone you know is struggling with their mental health, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit https://aristapsychiatrypsychotherapy.com/

Domestic Violence and Sports

Domestic Violence and Sports
By: Camillia Ghavami


When we watch sports games many of us feel passionate about whether our teams win or lose. Many find excitement in watching their favorite teams battle it out for the win, others may be terrified.


Tubi’s famous Super Bowl commercial in 2023, that made it seem like someone was changing the channel, is an example of the fear many women live in while watching sports games. Some may have laughed the prank off with their families, while those in more aggressive households were met with terrifying outbursts of violence. One woman described her experience with her boyfriend violently screaming at her to find the remote and then punching a hole in a wall. Another woman who worked at a sports bar described the whole bar screaming profanities at her.

The reaction to this commercial is bringing to light a relationship few know about between sports and domestic violence. More and more studies are showing that there is a relationship between domestic violence and the wins and losses of professional football teams. Empirical analyses show that in the US, there are more domestic violence arrests on Sundays when there are NFL games than on Sundays when there are no games played. This relationship is not just found in the US. In England, domestic violence reports rose by 38% when the national soccer team lost. Even when the team won, domestic violence still rose by 26%. The biggest cause of this rise in domestic violence might have to do with whether the team wins or loses. One study found upset losses (a team loses when it was predicted to win by 4 or more points) led to a 10% increase in domestic violence by men while the rise in violence after other types of losses (like when the games were expected to be close) were small. This rise in violence is even larger when the games are more important.

The problem of domestic abuse is an epidemic that runs rampant in this country. 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have experienced any form of physical violence done by an intimate partner. Additionally, 1 in 7 women and 1 in 25 men have been injured by an intimate partner. While of course all these instances were not done in reaction to a sports game, imagine if during the next big sports game, famous athletes came together and denounced domestic violence. Maybe this would lead to a new turn in our culture, where the possibility of someone changing the channel during the Super Bowl is not met with violence.


If you or someone you know is suffering from domestic violence, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

References:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3712874/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/making-sense-chaos/202009/nfl-losses-are-associated-increased-domestic-violence
https://trinitonian.com/2023/03/02/how-sports-culture-is-connected-to-domestic-violence-and-abuse/#:~:text=According%20to%20a%20study%20conducted,when%20no%20games%20are%20played
https://ncadv.org/STATISTICS
https://www.themarysue.com/that-viral-tubi-superbowl-commercial-had-some-real-life-consequences-that-cant-be-ignored/


Agoraphobia: Locked Inside

Agoraphobia: Locked Inside

By: Camillia Ghavami

                Agoraphobia is an often misunderstood and unacknowledged anxiety disorder. It is characterized by feelings of intense anxiety and avoidance of situations or places that are believed to be hard to escape. Agoraphobia is most often developed after having one or more panic attacks, leading to a fear of having another attack and thus avoidance of places that are thought to trigger these attacks. This anxiety is caused because of a fear that if a panic attack were to occur, there would be no easy way to escape or get help. These situations can include being in a car or airplane, being alone outside the home, or in crowded areas. While relatively ignored, this disorder affected 0.9% of US adults in the last year and 1.3% of US adults are expected to develop agoraphobia over the course of their lifetime. Adolescents show higher rates of agoraphobia with 2.4% of US adolescents aged 13-18 having the disorder. Additionally, while there is no gender differences of agoraphobia prevalence for adults, adolescent females tend to be afflicted by this disorder more so than men, 3.4% and 1.4% respectively.  

                Treatment for this disorder is similar to treatment for most anxiety disorders. First, psychotherapy, including cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), has been shown to be effective in treating anxiety disorders. CBT teaches people how to be less anxious by altering their thoughts, reactions, and behaviors to situations. An example of this that can be effective for agoraphobia is exposure therapy. Exposure therapy allows people to confront their fears and helps people engage in activities they had been avoiding due to anxiety. Secondly, agoraphobia can also be treated with medications, with the most common being antidepressants, anti-anxiety medications, and beta blockers. There are many ways to treat anxiety, and a health care provider can help you choose the best treatment.

If you or someone you know is suffering from agoraphobia, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

References:

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/agoraphobia/symptoms-causes/syc-20355987

https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/statistics/agoraphobia#part_2666

https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/anxiety-disorders#part_2223

https://adaa.org/learn-from-us/from-the-experts/blog-posts/consumer/overcoming-agoraphobia-qa

Social Anxiety: The Surprising Ways Parents Contribute to Social Anxiety in Their Kids

Social Anxiety: The Surprising Ways Parents Contribute to Social Anxiety in Their Kids

By, Maro Mikhaeil

Being a parent means you will have a defining influence on your child’s emotional and social development. From an early age, your child’s distinct temperament will control how they would respond to the environment. Temperament refers to personality traits that determine individuals’ interactions with their environment. While some children are ready for new experiences, others may demonstrate shyness or uneasiness when faced with unpredictable events. Shyness is a feature of childhood; however, children whose shyness, hesitation to engage in social interactions, or other inhibited behaviors are consistent from infancy to adolescence are more likely to be diagnosed with anxiety disorders such as social anxiety in their teenage years. Discovering this connection could aid you in nurturing your child’s emotional health from birth.

Moreover, a child that shows signs of shyness may hesitate when contacting new people and places, only look down or ignore other children or adults they do not know, and feel uncomfortable to express themselves when participating in social activities. Although, shyness can be temporary, the occurrence of shy behavior in several stages of childhood may mean that there is a need for such a child to have some extra support in their social skills.

Research highlights the crucial role of early intervention as children with shy or cautious natures during their early years have a higher chance of developing social anxiety disorder in their teenage years (Chronis-Tuscano et al., 2009). Researchers considered the possibility that kids who have been shy or anxious from infancy through childhood are more likely to develop anxiety disorders as teenagers (Chronis-Tuscano et al., 2009).

In a similar study, Poole and other researchers followed a group of infants from the age of four months. They monitored their social and emotional development until they were 13 years old. They wanted to know if the infants’ type of response to new situations (positive, negative, or neutral) would influence their behavior and social skills in the future as they grow older. Their research outlined how social anxiety can evolve and how early characteristics may influence these paths (Poole et al., 2022).

For example, if your child’s shyness is why they cannot participate in activities that are part of their day-to-day life or make friends. Then, it may be time to seek the help of a pediatrician or a clinical psychologist. The early intervention could assist in identifying any anxiety that might be the root cause of the problem, and your child will be equipped with the required abilities for a better future. Knowing that temperament from early on can influence mental health later on, one can take active roles in building the child’s development. It’s important to work out open communication with your child and make sure that you pay attention to their emotional needs. The more you do, the better it will be for your child to build these skills and establish valuable social interactions to help children reach their full potential.

If you or someone you know is struggling with social anxiety or mental health, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

References:

https://kidsinfinitelearning.com/social-anxiety-in-kids/

Chronis-Tuscano, A., Degnan, K. A., Pine, D. S., Perez-Edgar, K., Henderson, H. A., Diaz, Y., Raggi, V. L., & Fox, N. A. (2009). Stable early maternal report of behavioral inhibition predicts lifetime social anxiety disorder in adolescence. Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 48(9), 928–935. https://doi.org/10.1097/chi.0b013e3181ae09df

Poole, K. L., Degnan, K. A., Harrewijn, A., Almas, A., Fox, N. A., & Henderson, H. A. (2022).Trajectories of socially anxious behavior from age 5 to 13: Temperamental and sociocognitive pathways. Child Development, 93(5), 1334–1346. https://doi.org/10.1111/cdev.13767

Panic Attacks vs. Anxiety Attacks: Understanding the Differences and Seeking Help

Panic Attacks vs. Anxiety Attacks: Understanding the Differences and Seeking Help

By, Maro Mikhaeil

Have you ever felt your heart racing and felt completely detached from the world? Chances are, you may be experiencing a panic attack. Or have you ever felt so irritable and restless to the point where it’s disrupting your sleep? Well, in that case, you may be experiencing anxiety or an anxiety attack. Don’t get the two confused, as there are differences between them.

Panic attacks are intense, unexpected feelings of terror, fear, or discomfort. They are unexpected because they aren’t triggered by specific events and may occur without reason. Panic attacks are typically brief and only last several minutes. Physical symptoms include trembling, tingling, rapid heart rate, chest pain, feeling tightening in arms and hands, chills, etc. Symptoms vary from person to person, but these are the most common.

Anxiety attacks or anxiety are characterized by feeling restless and fearful that something is going to happen. Unlike panic attacks, anxiety attacks are triggered by specific events. Some physical symptoms include feeling lightheaded, dizzy, stomach knots, rapid heart rate, heavy breathing, hot flashes, nausea, headaches, backaches, and frequent sweating. Frequent anxiety attacks can indicate a type of anxiety disorder. Anxiety may not always be rational and may just occur because of fearing something bad is going to happen, even though it may just be all in your head.

It’s important to understand how you can differentiate between the two and to seek help when you need it. Often people don’t want to seek help, which can cause symptoms to worsen. Don’t be afraid to seek help, as there are many options available, such as therapy, medication, and lifestyle changes. It’s important to prioritize your mental health and take care of yourself. Remember that you are not alone, and many others have experienced similar symptoms. It’s okay to ask for help and take the steps necessary to manage your anxiety or panic attacks. With the right treatment and support, you can overcome these challenges and live a fulfilling life.

If you or someone you know is struggling with anxiety or panic attacks, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Sources:

Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders Fifth Edition by the American Psychiatric Association (DSM-IV)

https://www.self.com/story/anxiety-disorder-symptoms

https://www.webmd.com/anxiety-panic/anxiety-attack-symptoms

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/307863

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/anxiety/symptoms-causes/syc-20350961