Anger Management during COVID-19

By: Elyse Ganss

According to the New York Times, domestic violence rates have surged during the era of the coronavirus pandemic. Domestic and family violence rates typically increase when families have more time to spend with one another, a time that is usually reserved for holidays. However, with stay-at-home orders occurring nationally, families have been spending more time together and consequently, violence rates have increased worldwide.

Violence occurs as a result of out of control anger. Anger is an emotion that occurs on a spectrum from irritation to rage. Aggressive, out-of-control responses due to anger lead to abusive actions. Dealing with angry feelings in a positive way is crucial to maintaining healthy relationships. Expressing anger in a calm manner such as having a controlled conversation with whoever you may be angry with is a constructive way to address anger. However, if anger is not dealt with it can lead to passive-aggressive behavior or having a hostile personality.

The Mayo Clinic recommends various tips for keeping anger under control. These tips include thinking before you speak, expressing anger in a calm way, getting exercise to reduce stress, practicing relaxation techniques and receiving help from mental health professionals.

If your anger levels are out of control, feel unavoidable, or if you are often enraged, seeking help for anger management may be the best course of action.

A mental health professional, whether it be a licensed psychologist, psychotherapist, clinical social worker, psychiatric nurse practitioner, or psychiatrist, will work with the patient to develop a new way of thinking and behaving when faced with situations that induce anger. Although anger may currently feel overwhelming, a professional can help work with you to reduce your anger and to help heal and restore your relationships.

If you or someone you know is looking for support, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Sources:

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/06/world/coronavirus-domestic-violence

https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/anger-management/art-20045434

https://www.apa.org/topics/anger/control

Image Source: https://www.mindful.org/feeling-angry-try-this/

COVID-19: How to Cope with Stress During COVID-19

COVID-19: How to Cope with Stress During COVID-19

By: Alexa Greenbaum

In crisis situations, it is normal to feel overwhelmed with emotions. The COVID-19 pandemic can feel threatening, as there are many unknowns. For example, published information from reputable sources, such as in the media, news, articles, journals, government officials, and specialists in relevant fields of work often contradict one another. It is important to note that everyone deals with stress differently, nonetheless, focusing on being resilient in response to COVID-19 will help minimize stressors and allow growth from traumatic experiences.

In this time of many uncertainties and conflicting information, it can be difficult to be calm. Feeling a lack of control, fears, and ruminating on stressors can escalate undesirable emotions. These stressors can feel or be traumatic and as a result, especially in isolation, cause people to consciously think about how COVID-19 is stressful.

It is difficult to stay calm but to subside unwanted stress, taking a step back and identifying your fears and putting emotions into perspective is a great way to start the process of becoming resilient to chaotic situations. It is important to understand and accept that there are a number of things that are out of control in life and emotions cannot prevent stressful situations. As a result, growth is associated with reflection and cognitive processing.

In effort to overcome stress about COVID-19, some pathways to resilience include focusing on positive relationships, positive emotions, and hardiness. Connecting and not isolating yourself by supporting loved-ones, focusing on what is in your control, and connecting with larger social networks such as your communities can provide emotional and instrumental support. Communicating with others can also elicit positive emotions such as laughter and optimism and can influence the belief that one can grow from negative events.

Taking care of yourself during a time of crisis is of upmost importance. To do so, take time to unwind and give yourself a break from looking at the news, create a routine, and take care of your body and mental health.

If you or someone you know is experiencing uncontrollable stress from COVID-19 or another crisis, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/ .

Sources:

https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/daily-life-coping/managing-stress-anxiety.html

https://yalehealth.yale.edu/covid-19-managing-stress

https://www.forbes.com/sites/amymorin/2017/05/13/6-ways-to-stop-stressing-about-things-you-cant-control/#7529342630db

Image Source:

https://www.nysut.org/news/2020/april/stress-management

The Less Talked-About Side of OCD: Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

By: Isabelle Siegel

When thinking about OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder), most people instinctively think of those who care about cleanliness and tidiness. In fact, it is not uncommon to use the phrase “I’m so OCD” to imply that one agonizes over neatness and order. This perception of OCD is not without reason, as many people with OCD do obsess over germs, contamination, and order and engage in excessive hand washing, cleaning, and ordering.

However, it is important to note that this is not the reality for many other sufferers of OCD. OCD is a wide-ranging disorder involving the presence of obsessions—“repeated thoughts, urges, or mental images that cause anxiety”—and compulsions—repetitive behaviors performed to relieve the anxiety. These obsessions can take nearly any form, with contamination and order being only two of them. Some other common obsessions include thoughts about: losing control or going insane, harming oneself or others, unwanted sexual ideas or images, and/or religion. For example, it is well-documented that people with OCD may experience intrusive thoughts about homosexuality, pedophilia, violence and aggression, and/or suicide.

Many people with these less talked-about OCD “themes” take longer to realize that they have OCD because their symptoms are not in line with the stereotypical hand washing and tidying. These individuals often engage in different compulsive behaviors to alleviate anxiety. These behaviors may include mental compulsions such as repeated checking and rumination (that is, repetitively reviewing and evaluating one’s thoughts and their meanings). For example, the individual who obsesses about violence and aggression may repeatedly check that he/she has not unintentionally harmed those around him/her.

It is ultimately important to acknowledge this less talked-about side of OCD in order to encourage sufferers to acknowledge their symptoms and to guide them to get the treatment and help that they need. 

If you or a loved one appears to be suffering from OCD, the licensed psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, and psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy can assist you. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Sources:
https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/obsessive-compulsive-disorder-ocd/index.shtml
https://iocdf.org/about-ocd/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/overcoming-self-sabotage/201002/rumination-problem-solving-gone-wrong
Image Source:
https://www.helpguide.org/articles/anxiety/obssessive-compulsive-disorder-ocd.htm

Anxiety: Generalized Anxiety Disorder

By: Gabriella Phillip

Anxiety is normal as we all worry from time to time about meeting deadlines for work or school, or being on time for a scheduled appointment. However, people with generalized anxiety disorder, or GAD, experience a chronic state of severe worry and tension, often without provocation. People with GAD aren’t usually able to shift their focus from their concerns, even though they are aware that much of their anxiety is unwarranted. These worries can include overthinking plans and solutions, inability to set aside or let go of a worry, or severe difficulty with handling uncertainty. People diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder undergo persistent, excessive worry that occurs on more days than not for at least six months and show at least 3 symptoms of the disorder.

For patients with GAD, worrying is often accompanied by physical symptoms including headaches, irritability, muscle tension, difficulty sleeping or concentrating, sweating, hot flashes, and restlessness. Generalized anxiety disorder affects around 6.8 million American adults; women are twice as likely as men to be afflicted. Onset age of this disorder can occur at any point in one’s life, but usually begins between childhood and middle age. Generalized anxiety disorder can affect all areas of life including social life, school, work, and family. According to a national survey conducted by the Anxiety Disorders Association, 7 out of 10 people diagnosed with GAD noted that their persistent anxiety has a clear impact on their romantic relationships and two-thirds reported that that this disorder has had a negative effect on their friendships. Generalized anxiety disorders are the most common cause of workplace disability.

Treatment for GAD commonly includes medication, cognitive behavior therapy (CBT), talk therapy (psychotherapy), exposure therapy, and anxiety management; some of these treatments are used simultaneously. There is no single optimal treatment since what works for one patient might not be as effective for another patient. A combination of modalities is usually most effective.

If you or someone you know is struggling with Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Arista Counseling and Psychotherapy can help as we are able to provide a combination of treatments which have proven to be effective. Please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/ .

 

Sources

Click to access July%2015%20GAD_adaa.pdf

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/conditions/generalized-anxiety-disorder

 

Anxiety and Bullying

Image result for anxiety and bullying

 

Anxiety and Bullying

By: Vanessa Munera

Being bullied is not an easy thing to handle. It can be a traumatic experience for teens that are being targeted. Those who are bullied experience impacts in their lives such as feeling lonely, anxious, isolated, and vulnerable. Unfortunately, when a bully moves on to the next target, these consequences of bullying linger longer for the victim. After prolonged exposure, victims of bullying can develop adverse effects. These victims will experience depression, eating disorders, and thoughts of suicide. In addition, victims of bullying can develop some sort of anxiety disorder. The top four major anxiety disorders victims of bullying can experience are Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), generalized anxiety disorder (GAD), panic attacks and social anxiety disorder.

  1. Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD): this occurs after a traumatic or life-threatening event. PTSD can develop due to events such as a car accidents or losing a close relative. This disorder can also show up after repeated abuse or even bullying. Children who are bullied may experience nightmares, flashbacks, withdraw from others, or are easily startled. Kids, who undergo long term and abusive bullying, have increased chances of developing PTSD.

2. Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD): Kids with GAD are often tormented with worries and fear that distract them for their daily life activities. Those with generalized anxiety have a constant feeling that something bad is going to happen. This is not uncommon with victims of bullying. With GAD, physical symptoms may appear such as insomnia, stomachaches, fatigue, and restlessness.

3. Panic Attacks: Those who suffer from panic disorders must deal with unpredictable and repeated attacks. When suffering from a panic attack, the attack is usually with no warning and can cause physically symptoms. These symptoms include sweating, chest pain, and rapid or irregular heartbeats. In fact, a part of the brain called the amygdala plays a pivotal role in panic attacks. When left untreated, the sufferer will begin to avoid going out or things they once enjoyed, in order to prevent another panic attack.

4. Social Anxiety Disorder: People who suffer from social anxiety fear being humiliated or seen negatively by others. Those with this disorder often worry that the way they look or act cause others to mock them. This can cause sufferers to avoid social gatherings to avoid being humiliated. In fact victims of bullying often develop social anxiety due to the repeated shame and public humiliation they experienced.

If you or a loved one appears to be suffering from an Anxiety Disorder, the licensed psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, and psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy can assist you. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

 

References:

https://www.verywellfamily.com/bullying-and-anxiety-connection-460631

https://www.stopbullying.gov/blog

 

 

Burnout in College Students (Part 1)

Tatyana A. Reed

With school coming into full swing, before we can even get that deep, it’s time to look at burnout, particularly in students. Have you ever taken on way too many tasks and at the last minute realized it’s causing an overwhelming feeling of exhaustion and being stressed out? Or have you ever been so busy you feel like nothing is going to get done correctly or done at all? If you have felt like this, nine times out of ten you were experiencing burnout.

According to pyschologytoday.com burnout is “a state of emotional, mental, and often physical exhaustion brought on by prolonged or repeated stress.” Burnout is not a widely talked about topic unless the causes have been detrimental to an individual. In this article, we will talk about the symptoms, affects, and how to avoid burnout.

DIFFERENCE BETWEEN STRESS AND BURNOUT

Before we can talk about the signs of burnout, we first have to understand that there is a difference between burnout and stress. David Ballard, member of the American Psychological Association, describes burnout as “an extended period of time where someone experiences exhaustion and a lack of interest in things, resulting in a decline in their job [academic] performance.”

SIGNS OF BURNOUT

Here are just some of the early indicators of college burnout according to collegeinfogeek.com:

  • Constant exhaustion
  • Lack of motivation
  • Constant frustration
  • Grades beginning to decline
  • Struggling to pay attention
  • Disengagement from friends and colleagues

WHAT MAY BE CAUSING YOUR BURNOUT 

A study conducted by University of South Maine in 2006 had 354 students answer questions that helped look at why burnout may be happening to college students. Here are the four most prevalent answers:

  • 13% said it was due to lack of motivation on their personal part
  • 25% attributed it to issues caused by their part time job ( finance and lack of time) and due to family issues
  • 5% said it was caused by a professor
  • And the most prevalent answer was because of having too many assignments on their plate

 

If you or someone you know is dealing with burnout, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/.

 

References:

Harrison, Mike. “Avoid College Burnout.” Great Lakes Christian College, 22 Jan. 2018, http://www.glcc.edu/avoid-college-burnout/ (PHOTO)

Jerry, Lisa M. “10 Signs you’re Burning Out — And What To Do About It.” Forbes, Forbes Magazine, 3 Jan. 2018, http://www.forbes.com/sites/learnvest/2013/04/01/10-signs-youre-burning-out-and-what-to-do-about-it/.

Stephanie Cushman & Richard West (2006) Precursors to College Student Burnout: Developing a Typology of Understanding, Qualitative Research Reports in Communication, 7:1, 23-31, DOI: 10.1080/17459430600964638

Vaiana, Dominic. “Burnout in College: What Causes It and How to Avoid It.” College Info Geek, 5 Mar. 2019, collegeinfogeek.com/student-burnout/

Social Anxiety Disorder

Social Anxiety Disorder

Social Anxiety Disorder

By: Julia Keys

It is typical to feel a bit nervous before public speaking or maybe a little anxious before a performance, however, for those with Social Anxiety Disorder, or SAD, even the smallest interactions with others can provoke feelings of extreme anxiety. Social Anxiety Disorder is characterized by a strong and persistent fear of humiliation and embarrassment that could be caused by social situations. People with Social Anxiety Disorder struggle with feelings of self-consciousness that are produced by the possibility of judgement in social interactions. Oftentimes the distress caused by social situations can become so overwhelming for those with SAD that they begin to avoid everyday activities and responsibilities such as going to work, going to school, or picking up the phone.

Signs of Social Anxiety Disorder:

  • Anxiety about being with other people
  • Difficult time interacting with others, stuttering, trailing off, and reserved behavior are common
  • Self-consciousness in front of other people and feelings of embarrassment
  • Fear of being judged
  • Difficulty making and keeping friends
  • Blushing, sweating or trembling around other people
  • Other physical symptoms such as disorientation, shallow breath, diarrhea, muscle tension and upset stomach

Social Anxiety Disorder can be treated with psychotherapy, medication, or both. A common affliction for those with SAD is the rumination that follows social interactions. New types of therapy are being developed to help those with SAD deal with this common symptom: post-event processing or PEP Mindfulness based therapies are aiming to target the feelings of shame, worry, and embarrassment that are caused by overanalyzing personal performance in social situations. Cognitive-Behavioral therapy helps people with SAD change unhealthy thought patterns that may be contributing to their anxiety. Medications such as antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds are often used in conjunction with psychotherapy. Social Anxiety Disorder affects over 19 million people across the US; however 35% of those suffering with social anxiety waited over ten years to seek treatment. Don’t hesitate to reach out and get the help you need.

If you or a loved one is struggling with social anxiety, do not hesitate to seek help by contacting Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy, located in New York and New Jersey to speak to licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners or psychotherapists. To contact the office in Paramus NJ, call (201) 368-3700. To contact the office in Manhattan, call (212) 722-1920. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/ .

Sources:

https://www.anxiety.org/social-anxiety-disorder-sad

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201904/the-one-dose-approach-help-social-anxiety-disorder

Source for Picture:

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Antidepressants: What Happens When You Stop Taking Your Medication

Antidepressants: What Happens When You Stop Taking Your Medication

Antidepressants: What Happens When You Stop Taking Your Medication

By: Julia Keys

Anti-depressant discontinuation syndrome occurs when a person suddenly stops taking their anti-depressants. Sometimes individuals decide to go off of their medication because of side effects such as weight gain, nausea, or sexual dysfunction. Another common reason why individuals stop their medication “cold turkey” is because they may feel as if the medication has changed their personality. Anti-depressants are not meant to change one’s personality, but sometimes they can cause fogginess or fatigue which can make the patient feel “not like themselves” or “out of it”. However, abruptly going off medication can cause symptoms that are more painful and severe than the side effects one might feel on an anti-depressant that is not right for them.

The effects of anti-depressant discontinuation can be felt as early as a couple hours to as late as a couple days after missing a dose depending on the type of anti-depressant. Symptoms are typically ameliorated within six to twenty four hours after taking the missed dose.

Symptoms of Anti-depressant discontinuation syndrome:

  • Nausea
  • Chills
  • Headache
  • Vomiting
  • Problems with balance
  • “brain zaps” or “brain shocks”, the sensation of a jolt of electricity running through the head, neck or limbs
  • Anxiety

Unlike illegal drugs, phasing out of anti-depressants can be a painless process if done correctly. In order to go off of anti-depressants successfully, one must slowly wean themselves off the medication with the help of a psychiatrist or psychiatric nurse practitioner.

Tips to prevent or minimize anti-depressant discontinuation syndrome:

  • NEVER stop taking medication without talking to your doctor
  • Follow your doctor’s directions exactly when going off your meds. If you start to feel any of the symptoms of anti-depressant discontinuation syndrome contact your doctor as soon as possible
  • Set a reminder on your phone or computer to take your medication each day
  • Always keep your medication in the same place
  • Make sure to keep on top of your doctor’s appointments by putting them in a calendar so that you will never run out of medication by accident

If you are struggling with mental health issues and are in need of treatment, do not hesitate to seek help by contacting Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy, located in New York and New Jersey to speak to licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners or psychotherapists. To contact the office in Paramus NJ, call (201) 368-3700. To contact the office in Manhattan, call (212) 722-1920. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/ .

Sources:

https://www.aafp.org/afp/2006/0801/p449.html

https://www.aafp.org/afp/2006/0801/p449.html

Source for picture:

https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailv2&iss=sbi&form=SBIIRP&sbisrc=ImgDropper&q=imgurl:https%3A%2F%2Ftse4.mm.bing.net%2Fth%3Fid%3DOIP.w1jYI-8qe7WzoyGlc18DmQHaFj%26w%3D259%26h%3D194%26c%3D7%26o%3D5%26dpr%3D1.15%26pid%3D1.7&idpbck=1&selectedindex=0&id=https%3A%2F%2Ftse4.mm.bing.net%2Fth%3Fid%3DOIP.w1jYI-8qe7WzoyGlc18DmQHaFj%26amp%3Bw%3D259%26amp%3Bh%3D194%26amp%3Bc%3D7%26amp%3Bo%3D5%26amp%3Bdpr%3D1.15%26amp%3Bpid%3D1.7&mediaurl=https%3A%2F%2Ftse4.mm.bing.net%2Fth%3Fid%3DOIP.w1jYI-8qe7WzoyGlc18DmQHaFj%26w%3D259%26h%3D194%26c%3D7%26o%3D5%26dpr%3D1.15%26pid%3D1.7&exph=0&expw=0&vt=2&sim=0

 

Panic Attacks

Panic Attacks

By: Lauren Hernandez

Many people face anxiety on a daily basis. Panic attacks are an extreme form of anxiety that many people experience. Panic attacks are described as an immediate fear of dying, going crazy or losing control. People who experience panic attacks may feel intense fear despite no real danger. Attacks may last anywhere from about ten minutes to an hour or more. Panic attacks are categorized as either situational or unexpected. According to PsychologyToday, “situational panic attacks are triggered by a particular scenario while unexpected panic attacks seem as though they come out of nowhere.”  While general anxiety is the worry that bad things might happen in one’s life, panic attacks feel like a surge of imminent danger and often have physical symptoms.

Symptoms of panic attacks include:

  • Increased heart rate or palpitations
  • Sweating
  • Trembling or shaking
  • Shortness of breath or a feeling of being smothered
  • Choking sensations
  • Chest pain or discomfort
  • Nausea
  • Dizziness or lightheadedness
  • Feelings of unreality or being detached from oneself
  • Numbness or tingling sensations, particularly in the extremities or around the lips
  • Chills or hot flashes

Panic attacks are a terrifying experience; however, they are quite treatable and can be helped with a combination of therapy and medications. For people who experience situational panic attacks, it is best to leave the feared situation which will typically decrease anxiety and end the panic attack. For people who experience unexpected panic attacks, take note of where, when, and possibly why the panic attack began in order to analyze this occurrence further with a mental health professional. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is a type of psychotherapy that is one of the most common methods of treating panic attacks and anxiety disorders. Additionally, medication such as Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs) can help relieve anxiety and prevent panic attacks. Immediate relief can be achieved when benzodiazepines such as Xanax and Klonopin are taken. These medications are potentially abusive so they must be used with caution. If you or someone you know is suffering from panic attacks or severe anxiety, contact a therapist, psychologist, or psychiatric nurse practitioner who can help.

If you or someone you know who may be suffering from panic attacks, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/ .

 

Source: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/anxiety-help/201109/panic-attacks-what-they-are-and-how-stop-them-0

Image Source: https://www.google.com/search?biw=990&bih=595&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=Q5wHXaiRELCE5wL-1K6gAg&q=anxiety&oq=anxiety&gs_l=img.3..0j0i67l3j0j0i67l2j0j0i67j0.33453.34341..34459…0.0..0.142.768.0j6……0….1..gws-wiz-img…….35i39.JBLUi8nw2og#imgrc=403Bvppt5PFdbM:

Self Esteem: Low Self Esteem and Comparison

Self Esteem: Low Self Esteem and Comparison

Self Esteem: Low Self Esteem and Comparison

By: Julia Keys

It is easy to fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others. We compare ourselves to others so often that they rarely even notice it. A social psychologist named Leon Festinger first proposed the social comparison theory in 1954 stating that humans look to others in order to evaluate their own self-image. Comparison is a necessary part of human cognition. We need to compare things in order to make choices. For example, imagine you are choosing between two different new cars to buy. One must compare the different traits of each car in order to make a well-rounded decision. Unlike cars, humans have unique and complex sets of experiences and genes, so comparing yourself to others isn’t logical. Unfairly comparing yourself to others is an unhealthy habit that can lead to low self-esteem, feelings of anxiety, and feelings of depression. Everyone has compared themselves to someone else at some point, but some people seem unusually preoccupied with it.

Here are some reasons why certain people tend to compare themselves to others frequently:

  • They feel like they have a lack of control over their life
  • Low self-esteem, low self-confidence, or low self-worth
  • History of being compared to a family member
  • Lack of self-knowledge/self-reflective skills

Ways to stop comparing yourself to others:

  • Limit social media use and when using, seek connection, not comparison
  • Take note of how often you compare yourself to others and mentally tell yourself to stop
  • Keep a journal with your own goals, aspirations, and self-reflections. Many times, people become so attached to certain ideals that they adopt from others that they forget to develop their own ideals. For example, if a child was told by his mother all his life that he must pursue a certain profession, they may be ignoring other career paths that they want to pursue. It is important to self-reflect so one can align their goals and behaviors to the wants and needs of their true selves.
  • If you do compare yourself, try to compare yourself to someone/something that is just slightly out of reach and well defined. When comparisons are general, one can get stuck in a rut of constant unfair comparisons instead of taking action and being able to achieve specific goals. Additionally, comparing yourself to something that is so out of reach can be discouraging. For example, if a woman compares body to an Olympic athlete, she is not setting a defined goal in order to be more like the athlete. In this case, it would be more helpful for the woman to aspire to be like her active friend who walks every day and schedule daily walks so she can exercise more.
  • Practice gratitude for your mind, body, spirit, and relationships
  • Only compare yourself to yourself, which is also known as internal validation. Internal validation is beneficial to your well-being and self-esteem.

If you or someone you know is struggling with low self-esteem or confidence issues, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/.

 Sources:

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/childhood-neglect/2019/05/5-reasons-you-compare-yourself-to-others-and-how-to-stop-it/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/201711/the-comparison-trap

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