Laziness: The Harmful Effects of the Term “Lazy” on Mental Health

By: Rebecca Fernandez

               “Lazy” is a common uncomplimentary term in modern vocabulary for when someone is unproductive. Think back to a time a group member failed to pull their weight in a group project, or a time someone procrastinated severely, leaving everything for the last minute and creating a poor final product. Consider even a time where you witnessed someone who, by early afternoon, was seemingly unable to bring themselves to get out of bed to start the day.

Whether it was yourself or someone else that you imagined, it’s easy to write off everyone in those examples as lazy. However, there’s a major issue with doing that – “laziness” is often not the cause of these situations. Rather, many mental health conditions can create issues that simulate behaviors identical to laziness.

Take, for example, disorders such as attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), depression and other mood disorders, insomnia and other sleep disorders, and anxiety disorders including obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) and generalized anxiety disorder (GAD). Each of these conditions can negatively impact a person’s ability to be productive, making them appear lazy. People with ADHD can often find themselves imagining all of the tasks they could be engaging in at once and becoming so overwhelmed they feel almost paralyzed. People with depression and other mood disorders often lack the mental energy to accomplish anything. Similarly, people with insomnia and other sleep disorders often lack the physical energy to accomplish anything. People with GAD may have a crippling fear that they won’t be good enough at something, preventing them from attempting to do the task in question. People with OCD may have a crippling (rational or irrational) fear that something bad will happen if they do specific things, preventing them from doing those things.

               All of these explanations are generalized and therefore may not apply to everyone with each listed disorder, or be the only applicable factor for each disorder’s effect on laziness. However, if you or someone you know has been consistently labeled as lazy, remember that “laziness” is often more than how it appears on the surface, and that actively struggling with mental health does not make a person a failure.

If you or someone you know is exhibiting signs of “laziness” as described above that are getting in the way of day-to-day life, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/hide-and-seek/201410/the-psychology-laziness

Low Maintenance Might be a Bad Thing

By Katie Weinstein

In our society low maintenance is always seen as a good or neutral thing. People who are low maintenance are seen as flexible, nice, and easy going. If you are low maintenance meaning you can walk out the door without spending an hour doing your hair and makeup that is great, but if you are a low maintenance friend or partner out of fear of asking people to meet your needs, it is time to set boundaries and begin advocating for yourself.

Some people become high maintenance because their parents downplayed their feelings or were not able to meet the needs of their child for reasons such as working multiple jobs, having another child who was high-need, or suffering from an addiction problem. Other people become high need because peers labeled them as dramatic or they were excluded in school so learned to become an easy friend so they shut down their needs. As a result, people learn to be low maintenance so that they take up as little space as possible. In reality, if you’re low maintenance as a result of fear of asking people to meet your emotional needs and coming across as needy, it can take a toll on you.

It is important to first start with identifying what your needs are and what makes you happy. You also need to remind yourself that your needs are valid and it is normal to ask things of people. You are not being overly sensitive or dramatic. While it might seem horrifying to ask people for things, build up the confidence to set boundaries and tell people how you feel. True friends or partners will stick around even if it takes some getting used to. It is also important to tell yourself a new narrative about your needs. Instead of telling yourself that you are dramatic, tell yourself you are advocating for yourself. Once you stop being so low maintenance your confidence will improve, you will build better relationships, and people will stop using you. It is important to get as much in a relationship as you give. If you need help identifying your needs, building your confidence, or advocating for yourself, therapy might be a great option for you.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/between-the-generations/202101/are-you-too-low-maintenance?collection=1151944

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/sexual-self/202104/why-some-people-feel-sad-after-sex

If you or someone you know is low maintenance and seeking therapy, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/