compromise

Emotionally Abusive Relationship: How to Spot the Signs

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

Emotionally Abusive Relationship: How to Spot the Signs

By Erika Ortiz

Abuse of any kind must never be tolerated. Whether it is from your boss, spouse, family member, or friend, it should not be taken lightly and must be acted upon quickly before it can escalate to serious issues. However, some forms of abuse are difficult to distinguish and can be especially hard to come to terms with when the abuser is a significant other such as a spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend. Physical abuse is a well-known form of abuse; however, emotional abuse has a subtle component, making it very tricky to catch. Here are some signs that you are in an emotionally abusive relationship:

Controlling and manipulative- Your partner may make you feel bad for going out or give you a curfew when you’re out with friends.

Gaslighting- Your partner can make you believe points in their arguments or things you have “said” that never happened.

Humiliation and embarrassment- They may insult you, make fun, and make you feel bad about yourself in front of others.

Silent treatment/Stonewalling- After an argument, they may “shut down” to make you feel abandoned and cut communication.

Threats- They may flat-out threaten you in any way, shape, or form possible.

There is quite a lengthy list of signs of emotional abuse. However, it is crucial to be proactive and seek help. These issues can cause or result in depression, anxiety, suicide, and PTSD. It can even lead to physical abuse if it hasn’t already occurred. Please seek professional help immediately if you see any signs of abuse or feel unsafe or unwell.

If you or someone you know is experiencing an emotionally abusive relationship or signs of it, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit https://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com

 Sources

https://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/signs-emotionally-abusive-relationship

https://www.healthline.com/health/signs-of-mental-abuse#control-and-shame

Body Dysmorphia: How TikTok Impacts Self Image

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

Body Dysmorphia: How TikTok Impacts Self Image

By Erika Ortiz

            A new social media app called TikTok emerged and swept generations because of its easy use, likability, and relatability created by other users or creators. TikTok is used like a break from stressors in life since it can have a variety of entertaining and funny videos. The TikTok algorithm determines your perception and how you choose to “respond” to each video or comment you see and scroll past. TikTok has tons of videos, from cute cat videos to funny skits, serious world news, and even tips or “how to” for your everyday life. Since TikTok has gained massive popularity, it can be strikingly influential.  TikTok can also instill some negativity in your life.  Many videos go viral for the wrong reasons and are taken to a dangerous extremity. One type of TikTok video that always goes viral is known as, “What I eat in a day”. The creator documents all their meals throughout the day and some even calculate their calorie intake. Some creators claim it is to promote a “healthy lifestyle”, while others say it is solely because these types of videos happen to go viral and do well with their audience. Regardless, these kinds of videos seem to inflict the idea of having body dysmorphia or, ironically enough, an unhealthy eating style. Body dysmorphia or body dysmorphic disorder is a mental health condition in which people hyper-focus on their flaws and appearances to the point where they will never be “good enough” in their own eyes. Some of these videos show the over consumption of food, too few nutrients in each meal, or sometimes, too much food, and too much sugar and/or greasy foods. These videos have an alarming comment section. Users will comment something to the degree of, “Wow I eat too much”, or, “Maybe I should skip a meal or two.” As you scroll through these TikToks and come across a “What I eat in a day” or a video that promotes an unhealthy body image that makes you feel uncomfortable and/or negative about yourself, press report for “harmful activities”, then press the “not interested” option at the bottom right. Even if you do not necessarily feel that way, others still might, so it is best to do your part in preventing the spread or glorification of unhealthy lifestyles.

If you or someone you know is experiencing body dysmorphia and/or signs of an eating disorder, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit https://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com

Healthy Communication Skills

GalleryJudy Gurfein Leave a comment

By: Toni Wright

Oftentimes when we’re communicating it’s just to respond and we’re not actually actively listening. Communication needs to not only be about active listening, but about listening to understand and comprehend. There are numerous ways to improve one’s communication skills with others, whether it is familial, platonic, or romantic.

1) Speak face to face – Texting is not beneficial when it comes to trying to communicate effectively. Pick a time where both parties are able to meet face to face. This way both parties are directly focused on one another and things are less likely to get misconstrued as they might through text.

2) Use “I” statements – When issues occur using “I” statements help the person feel less attacked. An alternative to saying, “YOU made me angry when…” is “I was feeling angry when THIS happened.”

3) Don’t interrupt or try to redirect the conversation to your worries – For instance, “If you think your day was bad, let me tell you about mine.” Actively listening and waiting to speak is not the same thing. One cannot actively listen and also think about what they’re going to say next when the other person is done speaking. The speaker will be able to tell that you are not giving them your full attention.

4) Look for compromise – Instead of focusing on who’s right or wrong or “winning” an argument try to settle in a place where both parties are happy. Whether it’s through compromise or finding an entirely new solution, it is important that both parties feel that they are getting what they want.

5) If you need help reach out for it – Sometimes communicating isn’t easy and during conflict it may be even more difficult to try and stay respectful or if the conflict doesn’t seem to be improving with solely just the two parties involved, it may be beneficial to see a therapist. Therapy can help one find new strategies to use when communicating that can be used to avoid future conflict.

If you or someone you know has trouble communicating and/or resolving conflict, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/.

Sources:

https://www.marriage.com/advice/relationship/effective-relationship-communication-skills/bb

https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/effective-communication.html

https://www.verywellmind.com/managing-conflict-in-relationships-communication-tips-3144967

Image Source: https://www.marriage.com/advice/communication/communication-with-partner/