Abuse

Domestic Violence and Sports

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Vector illustration

Domestic Violence and Sports
By: Camillia Ghavami


When we watch sports games many of us feel passionate about whether our teams win or lose. Many find excitement in watching their favorite teams battle it out for the win, others may be terrified.


Tubi’s famous Super Bowl commercial in 2023, that made it seem like someone was changing the channel, is an example of the fear many women live in while watching sports games. Some may have laughed the prank off with their families, while those in more aggressive households were met with terrifying outbursts of violence. One woman described her experience with her boyfriend violently screaming at her to find the remote and then punching a hole in a wall. Another woman who worked at a sports bar described the whole bar screaming profanities at her.

The reaction to this commercial is bringing to light a relationship few know about between sports and domestic violence. More and more studies are showing that there is a relationship between domestic violence and the wins and losses of professional football teams. Empirical analyses show that in the US, there are more domestic violence arrests on Sundays when there are NFL games than on Sundays when there are no games played. This relationship is not just found in the US. In England, domestic violence reports rose by 38% when the national soccer team lost. Even when the team won, domestic violence still rose by 26%. The biggest cause of this rise in domestic violence might have to do with whether the team wins or loses. One study found upset losses (a team loses when it was predicted to win by 4 or more points) led to a 10% increase in domestic violence by men while the rise in violence after other types of losses (like when the games were expected to be close) were small. This rise in violence is even larger when the games are more important.

The problem of domestic abuse is an epidemic that runs rampant in this country. 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have experienced any form of physical violence done by an intimate partner. Additionally, 1 in 7 women and 1 in 25 men have been injured by an intimate partner. While of course all these instances were not done in reaction to a sports game, imagine if during the next big sports game, famous athletes came together and denounced domestic violence. Maybe this would lead to a new turn in our culture, where the possibility of someone changing the channel during the Super Bowl is not met with violence.


If you or someone you know is suffering from domestic violence, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

References:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3712874/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/making-sense-chaos/202009/nfl-losses-are-associated-increased-domestic-violence
https://trinitonian.com/2023/03/02/how-sports-culture-is-connected-to-domestic-violence-and-abuse/#:~:text=According%20to%20a%20study%20conducted,when%20no%20games%20are%20played
https://ncadv.org/STATISTICS
https://www.themarysue.com/that-viral-tubi-superbowl-commercial-had-some-real-life-consequences-that-cant-be-ignored/


Addiction: Alcoholism

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Addiction: Alcoholism

By Isabella Favuzza

American society deems alcoholic beverages such as cocktails a social normality, but many walk the fine line between social drinking and alcoholism. Whether you are drinking to socialize, conform, enhance, or cope you may find yourself unable to control the alcohol cravings. Loved ones may describe you as bad tempered or irritable and you may find yourself yearning for that next sip, regardless of the occasion. Many alcoholics are unaware when they cross that fine line; most don’t remember/feel the change.

Alcoholism is a burdensome journey that should never be traveled alone. Asking for help is the first and most challenging step for alcoholics due to guilt, shame, etc. Therapy provides the appropriate and essential tools to aid struggling alcoholics to cope with these anguishing feelings of resentment, anger, and sorrow. Throughout the course of therapy, a psychologist will help alcoholics identify drinking behavior/patterns, identify risk factors, set goals, think positively, provide intensive intervention/care, and routinely monitor the progress. Therapy is designed to construct a recovery plan that enables alcoholics to recover from drinking, regain control of their livelihood, thrive at work, and connect with loved ones. Ultimately, the alcoholic benefits from therapy by regaining control and reestablishing a healthy relationship with friends and family.

If you or someone you know is struggling with alcohol abuse or addiction please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Addiction: Family Therapy: Families of Addicts

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Why are Support Groups for Families of Drug Addicts Important? - Recovery Centers of America

Addiction: Family Therapy: Families of Addicts  

By: Isabella Favuzza

Addiction is a challenging journey that should never be traveled alone. Asking for help is the first and most challenging step for addicts and their loved ones. Addicts struggle with the painstakingly long road to recovery, but many neglect the pain of the addict’s family. Addiction is not an isolated incident as the disease affects the entire family and other loved ones. Family and friends typically receive most of the backlash and consequences associated with substance abuse. The loved ones may place the addict’s feelings/needs above their own and endure self-guilt due to the addict’s substance abuse and subsequent behavior.

Many families are challenged with the addict’s behavior and their personal emotions, resulting in a lack of self-care. A lack of emotional and/or mental care may lead to depression, and/or anxiety. You can’t pour from an empty cup. Family therapy provides the appropriate tools to help struggling families and friends cope with feelings of guilt, shame, anger, sadness, etc. Family therapy is specifically designed to remedy these undesirable emotions by allowing each individual to be heard and accepted in a nonjudgmental space. Family and friends can feel cared for and fulfilled, creating positive reactions with the addict. Ultimately, family therapy sessions enable loved ones to understand/support one another and cope with the addict’s conflict/behavior in a health manner.

If you or someone you know is struggling with alcoholism or alcohol abuse please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Source:

https://www.healthpartners.com/blog/how-to-support-someone-through-substance-use-recovery/

PTSD and Memory Loss

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PTSD and Memory Loss

By: Diane Ulloa

PTSD causes feelings of intense, disturbing thoughts and feelings related to their experience that last long after the traumatic event has ended. People with PTSD may relive their traumatic event(s) through flashbacks or nightmares and they may feel sadness, fear, or anger. They may also feel detached or estranged from other people (American Psychiatric Association). PTSD also has the ability to cause memory loss whether it be short-term or long-term, both can be affected. Four steps to fix PTSD related memory loss would be:

  1. Get treatment, therapy and medication are two of the most common treatment options for PTSD. Medication and therapy such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy [CBT] or prolonged exposure therapy have been shown to be effective in managing PTSD.
  2.  Stay Active. By staying physically active and mentally active through brain games or learning new skills, one can help keep their brain sharp and active.
  3. Prioritize Sleep, good sleep appears to be essential for memory consolidation and processing.
  4. Use Memory Aids, which are tools that are designed to help accommodate people who experience memory difficulties which could include calendars, notepads, and alarm clocks. (healthline.com)

The types of behavioral therapy that can aid in this memory loss and other symptoms caused by PTSD are:

  • Cognitive Therapy: A type of talk therapy that helps people with PTSD recognize the cognitive patterns that are keeping them stuck, this is often paired with exposure therapy.
  • Exposure Therapy: Helps people with PTSD safely face both situations and memories that they find frightening so they can learn to cope with them effectively. This kind of therapy can be particularly helpful for flashbacks and nightmares.
  • Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR): Combines exposure therapy with a series of guided eye movements that help you process traumatic memories and change how people with PTSD react to them. (Mayoclinic.org)

Primary treatment is psychotherapy, but medication could also be prescribed as needed. Medication may include antidepressants, anti-anxiety medications, and prazosin which has the ability to reduce or suppress nightmares in some people with PTSD.

If you or someone you know is struggling with their mental health and/or PTSD (memory loss) please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

Sources:

https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/ptsd/what-is-ptsd#:~:text=People%20with%20PTSD%20have%20intense,or%20estranged%20from%20other%20people.

https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/memory-loss-and-ptsd#causation

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/post-traumatic-stress-disorder/diagnosis-treatment/drc-20355973#:~:text=For%20PTSD%2C%20cognitive%20therapy%20often,helpful%20for%20flashbacks%20and%20nightmares.

Healthy Romantic Relationships

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Healthy Romantic Relationships

By: Arya Patel

            Healthy romantic relationships have many characteristics to keep the relationship stable. Some important characteristics are mutual respect, good communication, self-confidence, shared responsibility, and problem solving. Mutual respect means that each person values who the other person is and understands the other person’s boundaries. Good communication means having honest conversations and being open to speak about difficult topics. Self-confidence in relationships means when dating partners have confidence in themselves; it can help their relationships with others. It shows that they are calm and comfortable enough to allow others to express their feeling without judgement.

            Shared responsibility means taking turns doing the different tasks around the house and in any other matter. Some examples are arranging for meals whether for restaurant reservations, take-out, or cooking, making social arrangements with family and friends, plan weekend activities and vacations, walk the dog, take out the trash, clean the house, pay bills, etc. The last characteristic is problem solving. Dating partners can learn to solve problems and identify new solutions by breaking a problem into smaller parts or by talking through the situation.

These are some characteristics which can help to keep relationships stable.

If you or someone you know is struggling with unhealthy romantic relationships, contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Psychotherapy & Psychiatric Services. Contact our Manhattan, NY or Paramus, NJ offices respectively at (201)368-3700 or (212)722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit https://counselingpsychotherapynjny.com

References:

https://youth.gov/youth-topics/teen-dating-violence/characteristics

https://www.lyrahealth.com/blog/sharing-responsibilities-is-there-an-equitable-solution/

Toxic Relationships and their effects on Mental Health

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      Mental Health/ Toxic Relationships

By: Ingrid Guevara

A relationship where the behaviors of one person in the relationship are emotionally and, in some cases physically damaging to the other, is what is defined as a toxic relationship. In a toxic relationship you see behaviors like: constant belittlement, guilt-tripping, extreme jealousy, blaming and using manipulation to fulfill personal desires. Such behaviors take a tremendous toll on a person’s mental health. Toxic relationships lead to decline in self-esteem, energy levels and your overall happiness. Being in a toxic relationship creates feelings of insecurities and self -doubt which also leads the person to live in extreme caution while in the relationship. Realizing that a relationship is toxic is a crucial step in prioritizing and protecting your mental health. Then comes taking steps to setting boundaries, seeking support from loved ones or professionals and engaging in activities that bring you joy, all things that promote healing and personal growth. Always keep in mind that everyone deserves a nurturing and healthy relationship. It is okay to step away from relationships that negatively affect your mental health because your mental health is crucial and should always be put first.

If you or someone you know is struggling with their mental health, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively, at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit http://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com/

References:

https://primebehavioralhealth.com/how-toxic-relationships-affect-your-mental-health/#:~:text=Toxic%20relationships%20can%20severely%20affect,navigate%20the%20relationship%20with%20caution.

Misuse of the Term Gaslighting in Popular Culture: What does it really mean?

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Misuse of the Term “Gaslighting” in Popular Culture: What does it really mean?

By: Caroline Clarke

In this generation it is not uncommon to hear from friends about how someone they know “gaslit” them. When scrolling through Twitter, Instagram, or TikTok, it is virtually impossible to evade the word “gaslighting”. So what is gaslighting anyway? Where does it come from?

The term “gaslighting” originates from the 1938 play Gas Light in which the husband turns down the gas-powered lights to make them flicker. When his wife points out the lights have been flickering, he denies her claim and instead pushes her to believe that it is all in her head.

Nowadays, when someone uses the term “gaslighting”, they are often referring to a time when someone lied to them. However, lying and gaslighting are not interchangeable terms, despite that being the trend in popular culture. Gaslighting is a manipulation tactic often used in abusive relationships to maintain power over the victim. A technique much more malicious than lying, gaslighting causes the victim to question their perception of reality and their mental sanity. This breaking down of the victim’s mental state and their ability to trust themselves is a major reason victims will feel it is impossible for them to leave the relationship.

Signs you are being gaslit include (but are not limited to):

  • Consistently second-guessing yourself and your instincts
  • Excessively apologizing to the person
  • Believing that you are too sensitive or over-emotional
  • Doubting your own memory
  • Blaming yourself for the way the other person treats you
  • Walking on eggshells around the person
  • Feeling like you cannot do anything correctly
  • Making excuses for the person’s behavior or withholding information from family and friends

If any of these experiences ring true for you and you suspect you may be a victim of gaslighting, know that help is always available. Remember: you are not at fault in this relationship. The first step is to reach out and tell someone about the abuse.

If you or someone you know is a victim of gaslighting please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Psychotherapy & Psychiatric Services. Contact our Manhattan, NY or Paramus, NJ offices respectively at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit https://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com

References: https://www.thehotline.org/resources/what-is-gaslighting/

How to Tell If Someone Is Gaslighting You
For Those Who Experience Gaslighting, the Widespread Misuse of the Word Is Damaging

Shopping Addiction? Can’t Save Money? That May Be A Real Issue

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Shopping Addiction? Can’t Save Money? That May Be A Real Issue

By Erika Ortiz

             Most people like to spend and buy things, but some take that splurging a bit to the max and do it any opportunity possible. Shopping makes some feel good, however; some get this “high” feeling since the brain releases endorphins and dopamine as they shop. It’s one thing to shop while on a budget, while it’s another to shop with no budget in mind. All of the spending, unnecessary buying, and accumulation of debt is an actual issue called shopping addiction. It is imperative to break down shopping addiction and the different types. First, there is impulse buying which is buying something you did not plan on purchasing in the first place. It can range from buying a chocolate bar from the grocery store while waiting in line or buying your 50th pair of shoes. Compulsive buying is when you plan your shopping, but to an extreme and on unnecessary items. Compulsive buying is usually where the shopping addiction behavior occurs most. For example, say you did not do so well on an exam or had a bad day at work, your immediate solution is to go shopping afterward to make yourself feel better. Another type is bargain shoppers who think they are getting a steal price or great deal. They are still spending a lot instead of saving. Finally, there is bulimic shopping or circular shopping. These people buy and return just for fun; even though they are staying within their budget, they are wasting a lot of time and energy.

           Shopping addiction can be due to stress, loneliness, sadness, the need to fill a void, lack of control, avoidance of reality, depression, anxiety, etc. Nonetheless, this is a severe problem that needs an urgent solution because shopping addiction can lead to issues in relationships, growing debt, constant overspending, and even lying about spending. One way to help with this issue is to create a budget and try sticking with it. There are many resources online that can be great budgeting tools. It is critical to immediately get help if you have a very severe case of shopping addiction. Seek a mental health professional who can help you get to the root of the issue and understand what you are going through. Remember that there is hope and you can get through this.

If you or someone you know is struggling with a shopping addiction please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit https://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com

Sources

https://www.ramseysolutions.com/budgeting/shopping-addiction

The Fear of Commitment

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The Fear of Commitment

By Erika Ortiz

Commitment can occur in any aspect of your life. It is only natural to experience anxiety when there are milestones such as signing a new lease, accepting a job offer, getting engaged or married, etc. However, sometimes the anxiety can revert into something much more severe such as gamophobia which is the fear of commitment. It can prevent or inhibit any opportunity to move forward in life or create a stalemate scenario in a relationship where you love someone. However, it seems as though staying single is becoming the “safe bet” for most people. According to the U.S. Census Bureau of 2022, nearly 50% of Americans are single. Many people are struggling to settle down or find a partner. A lot of people recognize that they do have commitment issues; however, a lot of people do not understand why others have these issues with commitment. Recently, people have been struggling with mental health issues and they often carry that struggle into a relationship which can leave their partner or significant other feeling confused as to why the relationship is the way it is. Some reasons why people nowadays have a fear of commitment are emotional uncertainty, issues with anxiety, past trauma, insecurities, and self-esteem. On the other end of the spectrum, some other reasons can be an underlying or undiagnosed disorder that has gone undetected for which they need to seek professional help. If your significant other is the one who fears commitment, understand that they do not feel this way because they don’t love, value, or care about you. They are dealing with many emotions inside that may be hard to handle. In the meantime, you can respect their boundaries, talk to them, and hear them out. On the other hand, it may be best to accept it and move on. It is also strongly advised to seek professional help and try couples therapy or individual therapy as this can help move things forward.

If you or someone you know is struggling with Mental Health please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit https://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com

Sources

https://psychcentral.com/blog/fear-of-commitment-or-phobia#what-to-do

https://www.census.gov/newsroom/stories/unmarried-single-americans-week.html

Emotionally Abusive Relationship: How to Spot the Signs

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Emotionally Abusive Relationship: How to Spot the Signs

By Erika Ortiz

Abuse of any kind must never be tolerated. Whether it is from your boss, spouse, family member, or friend, it should not be taken lightly and must be acted upon quickly before it can escalate to serious issues. However, some forms of abuse are difficult to distinguish and can be especially hard to come to terms with when the abuser is a significant other such as a spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend. Physical abuse is a well-known form of abuse; however, emotional abuse has a subtle component, making it very tricky to catch. Here are some signs that you are in an emotionally abusive relationship:

Controlling and manipulative- Your partner may make you feel bad for going out or give you a curfew when you’re out with friends.

Gaslighting- Your partner can make you believe points in their arguments or things you have “said” that never happened.

Humiliation and embarrassment- They may insult you, make fun, and make you feel bad about yourself in front of others.

Silent treatment/Stonewalling- After an argument, they may “shut down” to make you feel abandoned and cut communication.

Threats- They may flat-out threaten you in any way, shape, or form possible.

There is quite a lengthy list of signs of emotional abuse. However, it is crucial to be proactive and seek help. These issues can cause or result in depression, anxiety, suicide, and PTSD. It can even lead to physical abuse if it hasn’t already occurred. Please seek professional help immediately if you see any signs of abuse or feel unsafe or unwell.

If you or someone you know is experiencing an emotionally abusive relationship or signs of it, please contact our psychotherapy offices in New York or New Jersey to talk to one of our licensed professional psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling & Psychotherapy. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment. For more information, please visit https://www.counselingpsychotherapynjny.com

 Sources

https://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/signs-emotionally-abusive-relationship

https://www.healthline.com/health/signs-of-mental-abuse#control-and-shame