How My Most Traumatic Experience Became My Most Humbling
By: Emily Mulhaul
When you go through a traumatic experience, the time it takes to recover is immeasurable and flooded with uncertainty. Overtime, everything around you begins to fade and you find yourself zoning in on your bedroom wall, for a leave of absence from reality. The previous night was spent in a pillow soaked with tears and the following night is expected to be the same. You are alone because you feel as though are burdening others with your pain, and now are trying to reassemble yourself on your own. You’re trying but right now you are physically and mentally exhausted. A couple of days pass by and maybe you’ve gotten up for something to eat or to take a shower, but in the end you always find your way right back to your bedroom. What you may be feeling now is numbness, opposed to the pain you initially felt.
Remember the pain that wasn’t ever going to go away? Although feelings inconveniently come and go as they please, they are only temporary. Happiness is not forever, but neither is pain and sadness. In the moment though, forever is exactly what it feels like.
Now that the initial, emotional pain has subsided you are left to feel nothing. Nothingness provides you with opportunity. This is the time to rewrite your story. The numb feeling is a blank slate and a new beginning; let’s celebrate this new beginning with an empty journal. It may be interesting to begin by writing where this emotional journey has taken you and where you would like to go. Write what you learned about life, about yourself, and about your emotions. You can even describe in detail the undeniable comfort your quilted blanket has provided you with throughout this emotional journey.
We’d love to help you rewrite your story and make this your most humbling experience.
The experienced psychiatrists, psychologists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, social workers, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling are here to help. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment.