Self-Sabotage: Getting In Our Own Way

Does it ever seem as if you’re working against yourself? Do you feel like your own actions are counterproductive? If so, you may be self-sabotaging without even realizing it. Below are 6 things you might believe or say which could be causing detriment to your everyday life.

  1. Diminishing your accomplishments and feeling that you are “beneath” others: This includes feeling like your successes are more from luck than personal accomplishment, and feeling inferior and incompetent in comparison to others.
  2. Constantly beating yourself up: Repetitively focusing on your weaknesses (no matter how trivial your shortcomings are) and wondering why anyone would truly like you as a person are red flags for self-sabotage.
  3. Believing that you don’t have the right to ask for what you want or need: Not standing up for yourself and/or denying gifts or help because you don’t feel worthy of them are only pernicious to yourself.
  4. Seeing yourself as an outcast: You might feel as if you don’t belong anywhere and that you are unable to fit in with any group. Though it’s true that you may not fit into your current environment, people with true self-sabotaging beliefs think of themselves as “abnormal” in any setting.
  5. Not being able to trust yourself: This includes thinking that your own perceptions and judgments cannot be trusted. You might tell others that your opinions don’t count.
  6. Believing that others’ wellbeing comes before your own: Catering to someone else’s needs and feeling responsible for their welfare more so than for your own is not a healthy way of living.

If any of these thought patterns, beliefs, or tendencies sound like ones you or a loved one do, it is important to break free of them so you are able to live a healthier and happier life. Consider reaching out to the psychiatrists, psychologists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, social workers, or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling. Contact our Paramus, NJ or Manhattan, NY offices respectively at (201) 368-3700 or (212) 722-1920 to set up an appointment.

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Source: Seltzer, Leon F. “9 Ways Your Old Programming May Be Holding You Hostage.” Psychology Today. Sussex Publishers, LLC, 22 Jan. 2015. Web. 25 Mar. 2016.

By: Scout H




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