When a person is being emotionally abused in a relationship, it is not always easy to tell. In some ways emotional abuse can be more devastating than physical abuse due to the victims’ tendency to blame him or herself. In an emotionally abusive relationship, the abuser systematically controls their partner by undermining their confidence, worthiness, growth, trust, or emotions by provoking feelings of fear, shame, or humiliation. There are 10 primary signs that distinguish an emotionally abusive relationship which are as follows:
- You feel as if you are walking on eggshells around your partner
- You never know how your partner will react, so you have to be careful with anything you do or say
- Arguments tend to escalate quickly and have no end point
- There are intense moments of feeling good about the relationship, when your partner makes overly sincere apologies or attempts to make up for bad behavior.
- The victim clings to hope for the relationship when these moments occur
- Your partner will let his/her anger out at you for something that is no fault of yours
- Your partner is possessive and jealous, and will speak badly about your friends—especially the ones who are of the opposite sex
- Your partner tries to isolate you from friends and family.
- Your partner cripples your self-esteem through humiliation about anything you try to do or accomplish
- Your partner has a two-faced personality
- Your partner’s personality confuses you by alternating between acting very caring and loving, and/or very hurtful and mean.
- Your partner emotionally manipulates you into sexual activities that you do not like.
- Your partner will bring up past mistakes as a reminder of all that you have done wrong in the relationship
- Your achievements are minimized, while his/her achievements are glorified
If you believe that you or a loved one is in an emotionally abusive relationship, the psychiatrists, psychologists, psychiatric nurse practitioners or psychotherapists at Arista Counseling can help you. Contact our Bergen County, NJ or Manhattan offices respectively at (201)-368-3700 or (212)-722-1920 to set up an appointment.
Visit http://www.acenterfortherapy.com for more information.
By: Margalit I. Herzfeld