By Irada Yunusova
First impressions, first dates, and first kisses are all very exciting. However, the goal of a successful relationship may not be realized if the first date does not go as smoothly as desired. Some people who may struggle with relationships do not realize that certain behaviors they engage in during their first date may be the source of the problem. Avoiding the undesirable behaviors discussed below, drawn from patient’s shared experiences, may lead to greater success on first dates.
Over complimenting your date may make them believe you think little of yourself or that you are fishing for compliments.
- Not being able to accept a compliment may come off as having low self-esteem or fake humility. Do not sabotage or minimize compliments by saying “Oh, please I’m hiding a lot under this dress” or “I need to work out more.”
- Over-planning can create unrealistically high expectations that make the real date less satisfying. Also, getting upset over a date not going as planned may make you come across as controlling or neurotic.
- Drinking excessively is a major turn-off. Although alcohol is considered a social lubricant, over-consumption or consumption of drinks with high alcohol content may distort the way you want to portray yourself by influencing your actions and by giving off the impression that you are not well put-together.
- Being clingy turns off the other individual on the date. Instead of texting the date immediately or over-touching during the date, living in the moment and allowing the relationship to progress organically is much more effective.
Relationships are a vital aspect of life. If you are struggling with dating or relationships, you might find helpful guidance by contacting a mental health professional at Arista Counseling & Psychological Services in Bergen County, NJ or Manhattan, NY. Feel free to contact us for a free phone consultation at 201-368-3700 or 212-996-3939 in order to set up an appointment with one of our licensed therapists, counselors, psychologists, or psychiatrists.